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guthmund · 02-15-2005, 12:58 PM

This is indeed an amusing thread.

I've never shit myself, but I've come quite close a few times.

When I was younger, I had a horrible digestive problem. I suspected I was lactose intolerant, but hadn't been to the doctor for an official diagnosis (this was before the Internet...) Anyway, on the way back from a classical music concert with a group of friends, the group decided to stop at Braums (an ice cream joint for those not in the know) and had a hot fudge sundae. On a particularly long and desolate part of the highway, I felt a distinct rumbling followed by the pertinent urge to relieve myself. I had my buddy stop the car on the premise that I had to vomit (to admit that I had to shit....right now, was too embarassing.) I grabbed all the napkins I could quietly get my hands on and rushed over some guys fence to shit behind a thick looking set of bushes.

In the middle of my business, I was interrupted by another friend. It seems they were worried about me as I had been gone for a while and had sent him to check up on me. He stopped short because as he said, 'the smell was quite unbearable.' and waited by the fence for me to finish up. On the way back to the car, I begged him not to tell the others what I was doing and tried to explain that the ice cream had did me in.

The rest of the ride back was horrible. I was so self-conscious. I kept smelling shit and every once in a while the back seat would erupt with laughter.

Knowing my friend as I know him now, the fucker probably told 'em. I was embarassed for a long time after that. Turns out the driver knew what I was doing all along. He was a better friend than the one who spotted me and told me it wasn't all that big a deal and thanked me for not shitting in his car.

02-15-2005, 12:58 PM	#13 (permalink)
guthmund big damn hero	This is indeed an amusing thread. I've never shit myself, but I've come quite close a few times. When I was younger, I had a horrible digestive problem. I suspected I was lactose intolerant, but hadn't been to the doctor for an official diagnosis (this was before the Internet...) Anyway, on the way back from a classical music concert with a group of friends, the group decided to stop at Braums (an ice cream joint for those not in the know) and had a hot fudge sundae. On a particularly long and desolate part of the highway, I felt a distinct rumbling followed by the pertinent urge to relieve myself. I had my buddy stop the car on the premise that I had to vomit (to admit that I had to shit....right now, was too embarassing.) I grabbed all the napkins I could quietly get my hands on and rushed over some guys fence to shit behind a thick looking set of bushes. In the middle of my business, I was interrupted by another friend. It seems they were worried about me as I had been gone for a while and had sent him to check up on me. He stopped short because as he said, 'the smell was quite unbearable.' and waited by the fence for me to finish up. On the way back to the car, I begged him not to tell the others what I was doing and tried to explain that the ice cream had did me in. The rest of the ride back was horrible. I was so self-conscious. I kept smelling shit and every once in a while the back seat would erupt with laughter. Knowing my friend as I know him now, the fucker probably told 'em. I was embarassed for a long time after that. Turns out the driver knew what I was doing all along. He was a better friend than the one who spotted me and told me it wasn't all that big a deal and thanked me for not shitting in his car. __________________ No signature. None. Seriously.