Hi all,
Thank you, Lebell, for your kind words. This forum has definitely encouraged us as a couple in the past, so we're glad to be of help to others who may be exploring their boundaries.
Well, from the female point of view, out strap-on experience was a positive one. I won't repeat ktspktsp's post, but will add a few logistical points: first, before playing with his ass, I gave him a back massage and kissed him all over to help him relax. This was in addition to having some calm music playing and candles lit around the room, which added to the ambiance, and we also both had a little bit of red wine.
Trying to slide inside him from doggie position really was difficult... so if any couples have a differential in height (ours is about 8"), I suggest beginning with him on his back and his legs up in the air, which makes his anus more accessible. It also adds to the intimacy since you are facing each other at that point; it was such a turn-on to watch him relax and enjoy the penetration. Once I put some lube on my free hand and started rubbing his dick along with the anal penetration, that sent him over the edge pretty quickly, which was great to watch.
The "Bend Over Beginner" harness wasn't too reliable for the smaller dildo, I have to say. The base wasn't big enough, or maybe it was just too flexible... but basically I kept having to push the dildo and base back under the ring at times, which was slightly annoying. That was another reason we switched to the bigger dildo sooner.
For myself, I found that the insertable vibrator was more of a nuisance than something exciting. This was because it was small and hard, and was right between the dildo base and my pubic bone. So basically I kept grinding this hard plastic thing into my bones, which didn't feel good, even though he and I both liked the vibrating sensation. Eventually I took it out.
And there were no feelings of dominance or power involved, to be honest. Mostly I was concerned about him feeling comfortable and enjoying the experience, so I focused on that task and enjoyed watching him. I think it's the same for him when he's penetrating me in any position; it's less about dominance and more about mutual pleasure, basically. I just happened to have the penetrating instrument this time instead of vice versa. In some way it was hard for me to not be the "receiver," since it took me a while to get used to that role in the first place when we first started having sex. I tend to be the more aggressive personality and didn't like being in the "passenger seat" at first, but now I'm accustomed to it and had to adjust to being the one in the driver's seat this time.
Overall it was a good experience and I think we are both quite glad to add it to our sexual repertoire. And it made for a memorable Valentine's weekend, for sure!
Let us know if anyone else out there gives it a try...