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Over parenting now will not correct the problems your daughter is encountering now. You cannot change the fact that she is a mother. Like it or not, you're gonna have to let her peddle this bike on her own. She may fall, she may ride it okay. You need to be able to pick her up when she stumbles.
She obviously has issues with defiance, her choice of friends in her life shows that. If you push her to rid herself of this guy, she will push back.
We all make mistakes. Some people make bigger ones than others. This is one hopefully she will learn from. Give her a little time. Realize this father is in your life forever. He will always be around. You can choose to fight with them, or seek solutions together. Isn't the most important thing right now helping your daughter learn/educate herself enough to get a decent paying job to support her & her child?
Make that your battle.
By the way, I was stupid & got pregnant by a "rebel" dude when I was barely eighteen. I had to learn on my own I had made a big mistake. Happily divorced now, I support my kids all on my own. She'll come around, but it will take time. If my Dad had done the same things you did, I would have acted the same way. Don't we all think we are smarter than our parents at that age?
Good luck with this. You'll need patience & nerves of steel. At least when her world crumbles out from under her, she has a caring Dad to come to.
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