Quote:
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Originally Posted by Daoust
There's a skit, which I don't know the name of, where there are play by play announcers doing commentary of a well known author as he begins to write his book. It starts something like " and he's writing his first word... it looks like...'the'. A great start. He's started 9 of his 10 books with a definite clause."
I forget the rest except there's a line where he says "this is Tess of the D'Ubrevilles all over again..."
Anyone remember this one?
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Haven't scrolled all the way through yet, but the sketch is call "Novel Writing" - the author in question is Thomas Hardy...
"Well here comes hardy, striding out towards the desk, looking confident and relaxed."
"Here comes the first word... oh but its not a word, its a doodle right at the top of the left hand margin"
" a meaningless scribble"
"...and he's signed his name underneath it"
"now he is just sitting there staring out into space"
"oh no he's signed his name again"
"... it's Tess of the D'ubovilles all over again"
"but wait here comes the first word. Its a definite article. It is 'the'"
"oh no hes crossed it out, and he written 'A'"
" and here comes the second word its 'No' doesn't make sense ' A no', but he's not finished it's Novembre, he's spent November wrong but he's not going back"
" and the crowd are going wild"...
This is from memory, but is a very funny sketch.
I also love the cheese shop...
"not much of a cheese shop is it?"
"finest in the district"
"how is that?"
"well, its so clean"
"it's certainly uncontaminated by cheese"
...
"do you actually have any cheese at all?"
"no sir, I was deliberately wasting your time"
"I'm sorry but I'm going to have to shoot you".
There are so many good ones, I'm not sure where else to go; Happy Valley, Spot the Brain Cell, A minute passed, commentating on the eclipse of the sun, eric the half bee (actually called fish license), killing budgies.
How about apology:
"We apologise for those of you who have bought this album under the impression it was in any way connected to the humourous television show Monty Pythons Flying Circus. This error occurred in the printing of the album covers. This album is in fact "The Pleasures of the Dance, a collection of Norwegian Carpenters Songs".
"We apologise for the previous apology. This appeared on the album due to an administrative error. etc...
insert piece of bad norwegian carpenters music...
"we apologise for thatextract from the pleasures of dance, the rest of this album is made up entirely of sketches from Monty Pythons Flying Circus!"