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Yeah I definitely agree with alot of you, I experience most of these problems at our university gym, which is WAY undersized. You have to go before 11:00 am or after 10:00pm when it's not packed to the brim. When I go, I talk to my friends if I see them, I don't see why I would be silent or all serious in the weight room. I want to have fun when I'm lifting weights, not take myself so seriously that I am not enjoying the experience and it becomes a chore. Granted, I don't waste time having 10 minute conversations while I'm occupying the workout space.
I don't think trainers have to look big in order to be taken seriously. There are two staff members at our gym who work with NFL strength and conditioning coaches and players during the season, but they are the smallest guys there. They know their shit better than anyone I've ever met at the gym.
I hate the dirty "clean" towels too, you'd think they'd use stronger bleach on them or buy new rags every other week. I don't know about the mirror stuff though. I can understand if someone is just being a dumbass and flexing in the mirror, but when you can see yourself lifting it motivates really well (especially for biceps).
I'm torn every day as to the right thing to do when it comes to resting in between sets. I don't want to leave, or else someone might jump in and look at you like your an asshole when you say "I just need 1/2/3 more sets on that." But then again, somedays I take a little longer in between sets and I don't want to look like a squatter. So I usually just stand around the machine/bench and walk around it a bit, but then I'm running the risk of looking like someone who is just staring at the hot chicks and wasting time...you see my dilemma?
I'm always really courteous if someone wants to work in with me because I understand that there aren't enough machines/benches/seats, but some guys are real assholes (usually the big meatheads or frat guys).
As for the naked man parade, well I just stay the hell out of the locker room, unless I'm weighing myself and even then it's In-Out.
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...I'm that cat by the bar toasting to the good life...
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