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I think the issue is a bit more complex than that though you make your argument eloquently. However, I do disagree.
Not all minorities are identifiable by their phenotypical attributes.
EX: I did not know that Colin Powell was "black" until someone told me so. I swear he's white. I'm "blacker" than Colin Powell. Also, is Sammy Sosa black or Latino? What about Jews? Tons of Jews look "white too me. In fact, all Jews (except Sephardic and Ethiopian Jews look white to me). Likewise, there's no "gay" look (I know there's a stereotype) that identifies someone as gay. Additionally, I swear there are a ton of dudes that look like chicks and vice-versa (cmon, y'all know at least one).
The second issue is your (as well as others) assumption that gay marriage would somehow be "unstable". There is no proof of that is there? Could a gay couple do worse to the institution of marriage than J.Lo or Britney Spears? I think those two should be banned for sure. Maybe let them have civil unions, they're obviously not qualified to be married or have kids.
As to your contention that marriages as support system for raising kids, well, either the system is broke or that criteria doesn't exclude gays. The American family (modern) is a poor support system for raising kids. SO many divorced, single parent households don't raise their kids. at least a middle class gay couple that actually wants to raise a family should be given a chance. They really couldn't do worse than the average American family.
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