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Quadraton · 05-15-2003, 08:25 AM

This is a little outdated, but one I always found amusing

=========================================

The year is 1999, and the government is extremely worried about Y2K crashing all their systems. Unfortunately, as all their software is written in COBOL, they have to bring an old COBOL programmer out of retirement.

The programmer agrees to the task, and begins looking through all the government's code. For months he pours himself over all the software, but the more he looks, the more grim the situation appears. He keeps going until he finally realizes that the world will be doomed come Jan 1, 2000. Computers will crash, planes will fall from the skies, and the stock markets around the world will collapse. He decides that he cannot live in such an apocolyptic world, so he runs away to have his body cryogenically frozen, with instructions to be woken up in the future when all these problems have been solved.

Fast forward 8000 years later. The programmer is unfrozen and when he finally regains his sight, he sees before him an advanced race of human beings.

"Why have I been unfrozen?", he asks. "Have all the problems of the year 2000 finally been solved?"

"Yes", replies one of the advanced humans. "They were solved many generations ago. However, that is not the reason we have unfrozen you. The year is 9999. In about 3 months, it will be the year 10,000, and we understand you know COBOL."

05-15-2003, 08:25 AM	#58 (permalink)
Quadraton Addict Location: Ottawa, ON, Canada	This is a little outdated, but one I always found amusing ========================================= The year is 1999, and the government is extremely worried about Y2K crashing all their systems. Unfortunately, as all their software is written in COBOL, they have to bring an old COBOL programmer out of retirement. The programmer agrees to the task, and begins looking through all the government's code. For months he pours himself over all the software, but the more he looks, the more grim the situation appears. He keeps going until he finally realizes that the world will be doomed come Jan 1, 2000. Computers will crash, planes will fall from the skies, and the stock markets around the world will collapse. He decides that he cannot live in such an apocolyptic world, so he runs away to have his body cryogenically frozen, with instructions to be woken up in the future when all these problems have been solved. Fast forward 8000 years later. The programmer is unfrozen and when he finally regains his sight, he sees before him an advanced race of human beings. "Why have I been unfrozen?", he asks. "Have all the problems of the year 2000 finally been solved?" "Yes", replies one of the advanced humans. "They were solved many generations ago. However, that is not the reason we have unfrozen you. The year is 9999. In about 3 months, it will be the year 10,000, and we understand you know COBOL." __________________ "A witty saying proves nothing" - Voltaire Last edited by Quadraton; 05-15-2003 at 08:37 AM..