if her on top hurts too...i'm wondering if it might be girth instead of length that is bothering her?
is she just feeling super stretched and it hurts (prolly some tearing if that is the case)? or is it only when you go in all (or most of) the way? and it feels like you're hitting something, or maybe like she has to pee really bad (before it gets painful)?
if you're too wide for her, it is prolly something she'll be able to accomodate over time. just go slow and use lots of lube.
if you are too long, well...you can try various positions but if she's still trying to take in all of you, it might not do any good. try her on top with you not thrusting at all--see if she can go a bit longer that way. if she can, then you just have to work out the adjustments on how much she can take. also have her straighten her legs during sex, that keeps you from entering as deep and provides a bit more clitoral stimulation for her (bonus!).
another thing to consider, if your length is the issue, how ready for you is she? sometimes men and women rush into sex a bit and the woman isn't totally ready even if she's wet. when a woman is aroused, she actually lengthens inside allowing her to accomodate more of you. give her lots and lots of foreplay and see if that helps.
have you noticed any differences based on her menstrual cycle? some women are more sensitive when they ovulate so that may be a factor as well. all that aside, has she seen her dr? there are other medical conditions she could have that would cause this problem as well.
assuming everything with her checks out...you might just be out of luck. some women like having their cervix bumped and will orgasm pretty quickly from it. other women just find it painful and as far as i know, lots of foreplay before sex and position change are the only things you can really do to prevent it.
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