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Ballpoint pens...
All my ballpoint pens will, at sometime or another, slip through a wormhole to a planet that is entirely given over to ballpoint life forms, where they enjoy a uniquely ballpointoid life-style, respond to highly ballpoint-oriented stimuli, and generally lead the ballpoint equivalent of the good life.
Now, seriously, I am always losing my pens and mechanical pencils, and I have no idea where they go.
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Apathy: The best outlook this side of I don't give a damn.
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