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Hardknock · 01-24-2005, 10:48 PM

I just bought my house and there's some old lady next door. I think she lives by herself.

I think she got a glimpse of me masturbating one day when I got the urge and forgot about the blinds. Mabye that's why she hasn't came over to say hi?

Is she bad? Maybe. maybe not. But at least she's quiet.

But, as far as crazy neighbors go, one story comes to mind:

My wife and I were living in a 4 plex and one the landlord’s daughter and her boyfriend/husband (not sure) were screaming and fighting in the unit across from ours. (We were both on the second floor of a two story building.) We listen with the door closed (they were that loud) and come to find out that she was pissed cause the guy had a picture of some girls tits in his car. They scream and fight for about 30 minutes then my wife has enough and she goes over there to check it out. I tell he no just call the cops let them deal with it. No, she says. I want to see if he's beating the shit out of her. Ok, I say but I'm going over there with you. My wife, being a concerned citizen knocks on the door, the pissed off chick answers it and go on to say that nothing is wrong but the guy is still pissed off, says something and she starts yelling again. At this point she goes into the kitchen and grabs a steak knife and starts swinging it at the guy. At this point I’m telling my wife to get the fuck away from this chick before she gets stabbed. Meanwhile, I'm placing myself between m wife and this crazy chick to protect her. She eventually calms down and loses the knife. She then proceeds to go downstairs, gets into her POS station wagon and proceeds to drive away. Or so we thought. She then got the idea of ramming his cavalier with her station wagon, not one, not two but THREE times. When it was said and done, his car, with the back end looking like a crumpled up piece of shit, it resting against a tree. My wife and I call the cops; give out statements and that was that. His car sat there for a good two weeks before he had it hauled off. Maybe he didn't have insurance or he had a hell of a time explaining the damage. Everytime I saw that car for those two weeks, I laughed my ass off. Couldn’t help it.

01-24-2005, 10:48 PM	#25 (permalink)
Hardknock Republican slayer Location: WA	I just bought my house and there's some old lady next door. I think she lives by herself. I think she got a glimpse of me masturbating one day when I got the urge and forgot about the blinds. Mabye that's why she hasn't came over to say hi? Is she bad? Maybe. maybe not. But at least she's quiet. But, as far as crazy neighbors go, one story comes to mind: My wife and I were living in a 4 plex and one the landlord’s daughter and her boyfriend/husband (not sure) were screaming and fighting in the unit across from ours. (We were both on the second floor of a two story building.) We listen with the door closed (they were that loud) and come to find out that she was pissed cause the guy had a picture of some girls tits in his car. They scream and fight for about 30 minutes then my wife has enough and she goes over there to check it out. I tell he no just call the cops let them deal with it. No, she says. I want to see if he's beating the shit out of her. Ok, I say but I'm going over there with you. My wife, being a concerned citizen knocks on the door, the pissed off chick answers it and go on to say that nothing is wrong but the guy is still pissed off, says something and she starts yelling again. At this point she goes into the kitchen and grabs a steak knife and starts swinging it at the guy. At this point I’m telling my wife to get the fuck away from this chick before she gets stabbed. Meanwhile, I'm placing myself between m wife and this crazy chick to protect her. She eventually calms down and loses the knife. She then proceeds to go downstairs, gets into her POS station wagon and proceeds to drive away. Or so we thought. She then got the idea of ramming his cavalier with her station wagon, not one, not two but THREE times. When it was said and done, his car, with the back end looking like a crumpled up piece of shit, it resting against a tree. My wife and I call the cops; give out statements and that was that. His car sat there for a good two weeks before he had it hauled off. Maybe he didn't have insurance or he had a hell of a time explaining the damage. Everytime I saw that car for those two weeks, I laughed my ass off. Couldn’t help it. Last edited by Hardknock; 01-24-2005 at 11:10 PM..