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Meanwhile...
I have ventured far into the realms of the "web" to bring you... nothing.
I got nuttin. The internet is dead. And boring.
Or, I'm having a bad day and don't have time to wade though the stagnant tide pools of humanity to bring you the pebbles of wisdom that you deserve.
I must go flog myself for my betrayal of your trust.
Or, sleep.
__________________
Someday, someone will best me.
But it won't be today, and it won't be you.
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