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We had some very fat people in the hospital I used to work at in high school. Many of these overweight people couldn't reach their feet let alone their crotches... many also had trouble cleaning between the rolls of fat.
Perhaps he needs a wash cloth on a stick...
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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke
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