I guess I have a hard time understanding how some people are thinking.
You HAVE to have compatibility with another person... you need to have things in common. If movies and music are two of the biggest interests in life, then what, you think I'm gonna go after the person who hates both of those and LOVES sports/cars (both of which I don't particularly care for)? No.
It's not being shallow, it's called compatibility. Using a litmus test of sorts to strike up conversation as well as to get a quick general idea about someone's personality isn't shallow. It IS if you said something like, "Oh, you like Britney Spears? Okay, fuck off then, I don't really wanna know you."
People who are complete opposites COULD get along well, but it's quite difficult to do if you don't share the same passions in life.
This has nothing to do with insecurities. Everyone has insecurities of sorts, but let me tell ya, music isn't one of mine. I'm quite content in knowing that most of what I listen to has inspired or will inspire generations of great music, so there's really no troubles or issues in that department...
No one is knocking anyone's tastes. I don't think anyone goes up to another person and right away after finding out they like Limp Bizkit saying, "God, you have such awful taste in music. You're a horrible person."
It's just a litmus test of sorts, and a valid one at that.
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people who listen to "mass marketed MTV bands" are not doing so because they lack the mental capacity to see through the devious marketing ploys that propel these people to fame (try to understand there is a LOT of talent involved in getting your average mass marketed teen sensation famous) they just don't care about it as much as others do,
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For that one example, it's not that they're incompetent or stupid, it's just that I would like to see the ambition to think outside of the box... to get interests and inspiration beyond what the TV tells you to like.
Seeing as how I got into music around the time Nirvana made it big, I'm not too far from the "subjected to mass marketed crap on mtv" tree, however, I did take the initiative to go beyond that. I started listening to a diverse amount of music along with those very bands that inspired the groups I like. Kind of a, "I love Nirvana... so who did THEY like? Led Zeppelin? Sonic Youth? Black Flag? The Beatles?" type of thing.
Since music is a very big interest of mine, of course I'll keep an eye out for people who are able to do the same thing.
If not, then that's fine because I'll try to find something else in common, but tastes in music will always be a quick litmus test that I'll use since music is something everyone enjoys. Not only that, but music/movies is something that quickly allows two people to strike up easy conversation.
A good example of how I used this in recent times:
I started talking to an ex-girlfriend of mine from high school over AIM. You would generally like to talk about something past the general "hi, how are you? what have you done, what are you going to school for?" convo, so one of the first things I asked was, "So, you still into Faith No More?"
From there, that spawned a convo about other Mike Patton related stuff, which also branched into a plethora of other topics.
Had she said, "Not really.." then I would've fished around for something else, maybe other music or movie related. She liked video games back then, so I might've brought something up about that.
Yeah, there's tons of other stuff to talk about, but you don't wanna dive into serious or personal stuff (politics is one) right away. You just wanna get to know the other person, have some fun chat about something simple... music just happens to be one of em.
I'm telling you... you might not belive me, but you CAN learn a lot about a person by a quick conversation on music. Like I said, I challenge you to try it.