BigGov

A funny note on this: my roommate had a friend who came up to stay for a weekend. Within 5 seconds of talking to George he began to repeat, "You fucking stink, get the hell out." If George ever walked into the room at all that weekend my roommate's friend would say something to the affect of, "Jesus, did something die in here?" Eventually George just asked to my roommate, "Hey, what time is your friend leaving?" and my roommate replied, "Saturday night probably," to which George replied, "Ok, see you Sunday."

Other people in the hall have resorted to similiar tactics but George doesn't pay any attention to them, he believes they are just making fun of him. He is too pig-headed in his ways to believe anyone. In talking to him this weekend I learned that on average he takes maybe 6 showers a week. I told him straight to his face, completely serious, "Double it." Repeatedly. "No, seriously, double it and maybe people won't make fun of you." "Seriously George, just try it." "George, I'm telling you, just take a shower everytime [a guy on our floor who takes about 4 showers a day] takes one and they'll stop teasing you."

You couldn't pound a message through his head with a jackhammer.

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One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink but then held it out over the beer and yelled "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU BASTARD!"