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I'll do this in 2 sections: the blacks then the reds. If I screw up somewhere someone with more experience with this show me up.
Overall:
You're looking to emphasise two things- flow and form. Flow is how your eye travels over the lines and onto the next ones. Form is found in things like linewidth, direction, and terminations. As you've probably found out, a line that has a single thickness or a purposeful increase/decrease is pleasing to the eye. In the black image, all the #5's are areas where line width changes with no purpose and it detracts from the image. DIrections and termination I will get to in the black image section.
Blacks:
Looks like you started on a red background and filled in with black.
1. There are a few places that where the black is overwhelming- lines jumble and meld together, lines end abruptly and there are isolated pockets of red. These are all circled with a #1 next to em. The largest is the top one, and it has little to none in terms of flow and form. (although the one below it has good potential to become a reverse spiral) It implies a lack of direction- since you were doodling, you took a wrong turn with the pen, and the line you drew didn't really mesh with the rest of the drawing- you turned it back in on itself so that you could restart it along lines that work with the rest of the drawing.
When someone is following it with thier eyes, the line comes to a jarring stop, or gets lost with other melded lines. The viewer gets lost and has to reorient themselves on a new line. Introducing objects like the two checkmarked ones below the top circled #1 box is a good way to maintain that form even when you take a wrong turn.
2. Crappy terminations. All the ended terminations circled with #2's suck. They lead to a dead end, there is nowhere for the eye to follow a new line, or escape out of the drawing (like the double spike leading out the bottom) The #3's are similar to the #2's except they make contact with the flat surface, with is unappealing to see. Imagine the line ending (termination) is like a car- if it hits a dead end, it either has to slow right down or even back up to get out, or it'll crash- (making contact). Tribal designs avoid this problem by throwing in layers- can go under and over lines. With a single layer, you gotta get creative to make it out of tight spots.
3. Line weight- thickness of the lines. Whenever lines meld together, even for a moment, they become a single line. When the line weight to change in this double/single line it looks unappealing- like compression and expansion. I've marked down as #5's where line weight changes
4. bottom right with the lines- I'm not good at this sort of drawing, but that would be my suggestion on how to improve the flow in that area. Get rid of the "hook" that turns into the wall, isolating the red. Get the line weight of the red consistent along with the black all the way up to #5. etc.
Red Section:
1. All the areas circled and marked with a 1 are sections where the red line thickness got a little too wide, but not wide or long enough for a black line, right? So you "cheated" and stuck in a little black to make it look good. I'm not saying it's not acceptable to do so, but minimize the amount of times you need to do so. It looks better than a large red section, but worse than that red section being a proper width.
2. The only curve issue I really saw in the whole piece. You draw a mean curve, Texan.
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