Awesome story, wrkime. Had me at the edge of my seat, until I finally fell off, laughing. Well, figuratively, but you get the idea
I'm surprized you did not put down:
6. Home Depot is actually an Earthly projection from the 5th level of Hell, a place where the slothful reign, and the people you seek are trapped in a perpetual lunch hour.
But despite that, you have taught me several valuable lessons today, and I am most thankful.
