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DJLaurieB · 11-13-2004, 07:01 AM

Ok, I dont' know how old the original poster is, or if it matters, but here's my advice for what it's worth.

I'm 35 and single. I make it a point to NEVER divulge the numbers. No good can ever come of it. It's one thing to talk about past relationships, that's more of what has shaped you as a person rather than the fact that you may have been a dirty whore in college. Which I believe most people go through at some point in their lives.

Here's why I think the numbers game is dangerous. Say for the sake of argument that I was sexually active at 15 (I wasn't). And say that I've had a few long relationships, a period of a few "one night stands" and maybe a few 3-6 month relationships here and there. That number easily gets up to 20 or 25 without breaking a sweat. (no pun intended). On paper, that number could make me a dirty whore. Do I spread my legs for everyone who comes down the pike? Not even close. Do I pick and choose who I share that with? Absolutely. But if someone I'm seeing has a way stricter policy about sex, like "only in serious relationships" and his number is closer to, say, 10....... hes' going to feel like I'm "dirty" or that I've been around, when it could be a hell of a lot worse.

I find the older I get that men worry less about the past and numbers, and more about the here and now. Past is past, and should stay there. At my age, it's hard to find anyone without some serious skeletons in the closet, and I know just as I wouldn't want to indulge every little thing I've done.............I don't think I want to hear about it from a lover either.

Just my $0.02.

11-13-2004, 07:01 AM	#12 (permalink)
DJLaurieB Upright	Ok, I dont' know how old the original poster is, or if it matters, but here's my advice for what it's worth. I'm 35 and single. I make it a point to NEVER divulge the numbers. No good can ever come of it. It's one thing to talk about past relationships, that's more of what has shaped you as a person rather than the fact that you may have been a dirty whore in college. Which I believe most people go through at some point in their lives. Here's why I think the numbers game is dangerous. Say for the sake of argument that I was sexually active at 15 (I wasn't). And say that I've had a few long relationships, a period of a few "one night stands" and maybe a few 3-6 month relationships here and there. That number easily gets up to 20 or 25 without breaking a sweat. (no pun intended). On paper, that number could make me a dirty whore. Do I spread my legs for everyone who comes down the pike? Not even close. Do I pick and choose who I share that with? Absolutely. But if someone I'm seeing has a way stricter policy about sex, like "only in serious relationships" and his number is closer to, say, 10....... hes' going to feel like I'm "dirty" or that I've been around, when it could be a hell of a lot worse. I find the older I get that men worry less about the past and numbers, and more about the here and now. Past is past, and should stay there. At my age, it's hard to find anyone without some serious skeletons in the closet, and I know just as I wouldn't want to indulge every little thing I've done.............I don't think I want to hear about it from a lover either. Just my $0.02.