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Old 05-12-2003, 12:20 PM   #10 (permalink)
Lovely
Upright
 
Let's blame pop-industry. Let's blame the God of pop-industry. LET'S BLAME ROI!!!!! =)

Here we go: ROI says: I want my profit and I want it now! "Ok", says the boss of the record company, (who by the way happens to be God from the musicians' point of view..):I have two A&R persons; Goldfinger and Madaboutmusic. Which do you wanna work with? ROI chooses Goldfinger,and Madaboutmusic gets fired.

Goldfinger now needs to build a super brand. One that has less than three flaws. One that the average consumer can be persuaded to like.

Raw-material sucks. A human being is usually needed to give a face and a mouth to the brand. Music is needed, too. And musicians, like most artists mean trouble to the hard-working, money-loving, efficiency-oriented, next-to-god- Goldfinger.

Goldfinger first tries to break up a band he has signed before. He wants the songwriter from there. But this irritatingly talented idiot tells his band, and Goldfinger receives a photo of five bare asses with autographs. Goldfinger turns to his old songwriters. Asks them for any leftovers, that they haven't given to their favourite artists. He then takes a pretty girl who wants to be a star to lunch. Finds out all about her. Finally she, and some others are rated on showmanship, sex appeal, looks and musicianship. A mind that can easily be tampered with is a plus, too...

Finally there are songs, there is the performer, and all you need is Marketing!!! Making up the story of the artist. Deciding the look. And "preparing" the future star for interviews and making sure she developes the "right" attitude. Goldfinger is happy.

This story has a happy end. Goldfinger didn't have to resort to the more troublesome and inefficient alternative; an artist or a band who writes their own music and waste a lot of time putting their hearts into their art - these people who have this imaginary world inside their heads and who find music more important than the color of their pants. And - who dare bore the hell out of magazine readers dwelling on music instead of telling people which designer fills their wardrobe this season.

ps. I'm wearing pink pants
Lovely is offline  
 

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