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No its cool, I sometimes do think about how good it will be in the future. Its just before she was always in those dreams.
So get this. She shows up to pick up the kids today and I ask her how things were and she kinds laughed and said they were good. Later I asked if she had to drive her car (out to eufala springs) and she said that she went up there on a motorcycle. Which pisses me off cause one, she is hanging on some guy the intire time, and second she has always told me how much she likes guys on motorcycles and that once before we were married she gave head to 2 guys one night cause they both rode bikes. So needless to say that kinda pissed me off.
As she was leaving I asked her if I should just get an attorney. She said something like "already??" I just said I was tired of being married to a whore. I said I deserve better and if she wants to go fuck guys then she won't be doing it as my wife.
So yeah, now I am kinda depressed. So thinking about the future is really the only thing that can keep me going. The only problem is the uncertainty.
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It's hard to remember we're alive for the first time
It's hard to remember we're alive for the last time
It's hard to remember to live before you die
It's hard to remember that our lives are such a short time
It's hard to remember when it takes such a long time
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