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If you absolutely want to have sex with your wife though, you've basically got to chat her (or him) up for a few minutes. Give gifts, strike poses, laugh, things like that. Pretty soon, she/he will turn green, indicating a dynamic interaction option. Talk to them, and you'll be asked if you want to go to bed with your wife (even if it's a he). Say yes, and you're treated to a black screen with your wife moaning, and/or giggling, and/or saying "Ooh, that's nice.", and perhaps some other options I haven't discovered.
Have fun!
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