Basically what has worked for me is a really slow entry time period. I do tend to get some acute pain at first but then if he just holds it there (not even fully in yet) without moving for a minute or two, then I'll adjust and the festivities can begin. Also over time it has gotten a lot easier, so that now I don't even find that necessary. It took years though, although I can't say I do it all that frequently. I don't know about the orgasm though - now I feel like I'm missing out.
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