Drider_it

yet im still in my body.. i come wide awake.. its like this.. as i wake up there is utter silence.. i cant hear a thing.. my eyes are wide open yet im trying not to look around cuz i know there is something in my room.. its there tangable just outta my eyes site.. i focus on the frist thing that come to me when this happens and i dont shift my eyes.. slowly i gather my will.. focus it .. i mean i compress my will into a tangable ball of force and push with it.. then bam.. sound returns with the ability to move.. after i turned 18 i kept a loaded gun under my pillow.. see my parents drove trucks and was gone for weeks at a time my sister moved out got married at a young age.. i had the big old house to myself. Creeps me out to this day to even just type this much.

yet I know something was there.. it was the same thing everytime.. a prescence a terrible affinity that i could never see but could feel its power.. it would end the moment i could force myself to blink.. funny how the thought of a physical weapon could protect you from something that was metaphysical.

it ended the day i got married.. it started to happen and i dreamt i was in a cirlce filed.. hay grass knee high.. tall old growth trees all around.. it was night .. no moon yet you could see by the stars.. heh even stars..

after 20 or so min sitting there waiting something came outta the woods.. tall.. foreboding.. it never spoke i couldnt describe it except for a feeling of sadness and utter evil.. i told it i was done playing.. im done running.. i stood up.. that feeling griped me but i remember what i did that day with my partents.. and took a step. that step became a walk then a run.. i screamed.. i have never remember ever screaming in my dreams.. yet i did.. and knowing that unlocked a power ive always had.. controlling my dreams to a bit.

in my hands a broad sword appeared with crackling energy coarsing along its length.. i leaped at it and swung.. i woke up then to a sense of freedom ive never felt.. never has they happened since.. what ever it was was destroyed .. forever i hope.. i watch my three children now.. wondering if or when this will happen.. and ill be damn if it does and i sit back and laugh like my parents did.

heh.. well im good with words a bit so i let ya know in detail what it was like for me. I hated it... i dont want anyone to go through it even in a light mild way.. much less the hell i felt.. that was my original feeling

if ever a doc or phsyic tells me different.. *ka pow* just cuz you go to school and get your head full of info on how to deal with the human mind dont make you an athority on the human phsyic and the ability to judge another human being. I find it funny how when the human mind sees or hears something that is "alien" to its thinking it passes it off as scoff and that science can eventaully rule out the metaphysical.. bs i say bs.


which for all of use that feel drained.. emotional and physical are one in the same in my beliefs.. you used all the mental ability ot force your way outta that state of dreaming.. your body i promise locked up to help you somehow.. and when you finally woke up it relaxed and had to wait for the start up. wway i look at it.

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It means only one thing, and everything: Cut. Once committed to fight, Cut. Everything else is secondary. Cut. That is your duty, your purpose, your hunger. There is no rule more important, no commitment that overrides that one. Cut. The lines are a portrayal of the dance. Cut from the void, not from bewilderment. Cut the enemy as quickly and directly as possible. Cut with certainty. Cut decisively, resoultely. Cut into his strength. Flow through the gaps in his guard. Cut him. Cut him down utterly. Don't allow him a breath. Crush him. Cut him without mercy to the depth of his spirit. It is the balance to life: death. It is the dance with death. It is the law a war wizard lives by, or he dies.