Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Share Your Worst Break-Ups

Echodork · 10-18-2004, 08:19 AM

Ok, I guess this thread gets my first post.

Sophomore year in college, I've been dating this girl for a little over a year. She's fairly needy, wants more of my attention than I want to give, is always calling and dropping by my place unannounced, etc. I love her, but I'm a college kid and I'm "doing my own thing." So one day I call her over for a talk, I explain that I need a little more space, that I still love her, but basically she's getting too clingy. She seems ok with this, and we stay together.

Our relationship, however, reversed polarity overnight. After that, I never got to see her at all... she made plans for every night of the week to go out with her friends, and when I did get to spend time with her, she'd send me home at 8pm so she could "study." The sex was good, but it was becoming much less frequent... to the point where I'd leave her house with a little shrug and a "same old story" after being turned away. It got to the point where she'd want to bring a friend along on our "dates" ("I told Cindy I'd hang out with her tonight, but if YOU want to come along, you can"). So I broke it off, because I wasn't getting what I needed from the relationship.

But I'm a sucker, and I didn't make a clean break. I wanted to get back together after a month or so, and so did she. Supposedly. But she was dating another guy at the time (they had their first date two days BEFORE we broke up, and she lied to me about it, of course... but that's not even the focus of my story), and she told me she would "date us both" and "decide what she wanted." Being stupid, I agreed. The next two months were a series of awkward dates and evenings at home. She refused to make a choice, and there was very little physical intimacy during the whole thing... maybe some kissing, very little more. I'd spend the night on her couch and check my email on her computer in the morning, and this other guy would leave her nasty, cybersex-ish IMs and shit. I let her drag me around for probably three months before I gave her the ultimatum - choose me or I'll make the choice for you. To my joy, she chose me. To my dismay, the relationship had nothing left to stand on, and we parted ways for the last time about three weeks later.

She immediately blocked me from IM, and I assume, email. She moved soon after, and got a new phone number. Stopped hanging out with our mutual friends. In fact, since the day we broke up, I don't think we ever spoke again. I saw her in the bookstore once, we mumbled a "hi" and moved past each other. I worked with one of the girls in her "circle" about a year after the breakup, and she said that my ex basically isolated herself from all of her friends after we broke up, graduated, and moved on with her new life. More power to her, I guess. I wish her happiness, wherever she is.

10-18-2004, 08:19 AM	#58 (permalink)
Echodork Tilted	Ok, I guess this thread gets my first post. Sophomore year in college, I've been dating this girl for a little over a year. She's fairly needy, wants more of my attention than I want to give, is always calling and dropping by my place unannounced, etc. I love her, but I'm a college kid and I'm "doing my own thing." So one day I call her over for a talk, I explain that I need a little more space, that I still love her, but basically she's getting too clingy. She seems ok with this, and we stay together. Our relationship, however, reversed polarity overnight. After that, I never got to see her at all... she made plans for every night of the week to go out with her friends, and when I did get to spend time with her, she'd send me home at 8pm so she could "study." The sex was good, but it was becoming much less frequent... to the point where I'd leave her house with a little shrug and a "same old story" after being turned away. It got to the point where she'd want to bring a friend along on our "dates" ("I told Cindy I'd hang out with her tonight, but if YOU want to come along, you can"). So I broke it off, because I wasn't getting what I needed from the relationship. But I'm a sucker, and I didn't make a clean break. I wanted to get back together after a month or so, and so did she. Supposedly. But she was dating another guy at the time (they had their first date two days BEFORE we broke up, and she lied to me about it, of course... but that's not even the focus of my story), and she told me she would "date us both" and "decide what she wanted." Being stupid, I agreed. The next two months were a series of awkward dates and evenings at home. She refused to make a choice, and there was very little physical intimacy during the whole thing... maybe some kissing, very little more. I'd spend the night on her couch and check my email on her computer in the morning, and this other guy would leave her nasty, cybersex-ish IMs and shit. I let her drag me around for probably three months before I gave her the ultimatum - choose me or I'll make the choice for you. To my joy, she chose me. To my dismay, the relationship had nothing left to stand on, and we parted ways for the last time about three weeks later. She immediately blocked me from IM, and I assume, email. She moved soon after, and got a new phone number. Stopped hanging out with our mutual friends. In fact, since the day we broke up, I don't think we ever spoke again. I saw her in the bookstore once, we mumbled a "hi" and moved past each other. I worked with one of the girls in her "circle" about a year after the breakup, and she said that my ex basically isolated herself from all of her friends after we broke up, graduated, and moved on with her new life. More power to her, I guess. I wish her happiness, wherever she is.