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Old 10-18-2004, 12:29 AM   #53 (permalink)
KirStang
Future Bureaucrat
 
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Ahh, this one isn't nearly as bad as your guys's. And she wasn't even my girl friend

Known this girl since sixth grade through chinese school, had a crush on her for a long time, but never really acted on it. Until 9th grade. Asked her out in 9th grade, but she just ignored the question, which ultimately left me crushed. But i was new at the game and eventually got over her, since she went to another school. So i tried (successfully i think) to move on, and tried my hand with other girls.

Come 12th grade, i haven't talked to her for like 3 years. I show up to a Chinese School function and there she is, still as attractive as ever. We hit it off pretty good, talk alot, become good friends, much closer than we had ever been before. Start hanging out more, going to events and such....

Asked her out once in february, she gives me the, "i got a boyfriend" spiel (long distance guy, everybody, including her friends telling me he's no good...probably shouldn't have asked her out)... i try to let it go and move past that. Then i'm still chillin' with her, try asking her out in april, but get the "i'm not over my boyfriend" stuff again. All's good. I accept it and move on.

Prom comes around, i need a date, i ask her to go, as a friend, but then somewhere in there i end up falling madly in love with her. She leaves for china 3 days after prom.

When she returns i detect a big difference in her. Don't know if it's me, or her, but there's a bit of tension. Before she left, we had been *very* close (looking back..i was probably on friend ladder.) But upon her return, she kinda ignored me.

I held on for about 2 more months after that hoping that there was something...but i knew all along that it was pretty much a dead subject. Finally asked her directly what was up in early august and got hit with the cold hard truth...I cried all night and all day...still get a little sad when i think about that night.

Two months later, i'm still not really over her. I guess it was because she was pretty much somethign liek a first love. I really thought she reciprocated. I hate it whenever i see her on Campus or whenever she shows up at events that i go to. Part of me wants her alot, the other part realizes that it's all going to be a bunch of games and heart break.

Yep, so much for being young and inexperienced. Looking back, i feel naive, and a little stupid, but i still can't erase the fact that i miss her alot and feel super lonely alot of times. I feel a little better now
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