~ I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
~ I used to have a handle on life but it broke.
~ Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
~ You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!
~ Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
~ Earth...the insane asylum for the universe.
~ I'm not a complete idiot....some parts are missing.
~ God must love stupid people. He made so many of them.
~ That gene pool could use a little chlorine.
~ It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you. (Okay now this one just makes me laugh...for one particular reason....ya ya you know who you are don't you
~ Beer - the reason I get up each afternoon.
~ Procrastinate....Now
~ The trouble with life is there's no background music.
~ The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson