Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - You ever meet someone that is actually painful to talk to?

Rodney · 10-03-2004, 05:58 PM

I've learned, over time, not to try to fill the silence when someone else runs out of words. If there's nothing to say, there's nothing to say. I'm okay with what's called a companionable silence -- two people in each other's company, saying nothing.

The amount of talking that people are willing and able to do is, to a degree, hard-wired. Some people can talk effortlessly for an hour and happily fill the entire conversation space. I know who can't help themselves -- it gets tiresome.

Others say everything they want in a couple of minutes and fall silent. But, following on what cybermike says -- just because you can talk for an hour doesn't mean you'll communicate more of importance than a guy who covers the same ground in two minutes.

I once spent 16 hours in a car, over two days, with a guy who just couldn't let there be silence. The problem is that he'd dominate the conversation -- he wouldn't actually listen to my input, just wait until I stopped talking and then continue with what he was saying. After a while, I just stopped talking and let him talk; I wanted to see how long he could carry a monologue. Six hours -- it was amazing.

After that, I have no problems with people who keep it short and sweet!

10-03-2004, 05:58 PM	#6 (permalink)
Rodney Observant Ruminant Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town	I've learned, over time, not to try to fill the silence when someone else runs out of words. If there's nothing to say, there's nothing to say. I'm okay with what's called a companionable silence -- two people in each other's company, saying nothing. The amount of talking that people are willing and able to do is, to a degree, hard-wired. Some people can talk effortlessly for an hour and happily fill the entire conversation space. I know who can't help themselves -- it gets tiresome. Others say everything they want in a couple of minutes and fall silent. But, following on what cybermike says -- just because you can talk for an hour doesn't mean you'll communicate more of importance than a guy who covers the same ground in two minutes. I once spent 16 hours in a car, over two days, with a guy who just couldn't let there be silence. The problem is that he'd dominate the conversation -- he wouldn't actually listen to my input, just wait until I stopped talking and then continue with what he was saying. After a while, I just stopped talking and let him talk; I wanted to see how long he could carry a monologue. Six hours -- it was amazing. After that, I have no problems with people who keep it short and sweet! Last edited by Rodney; 10-03-2004 at 06:02 PM..