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Heres my perspective, can I venture to guess a few things about your relationship?
First, You are probably the type of guy that Deifys his Woman. You like to find someone great and then worship her as if she were a goddess. Although younger than you, she has been in many more relationships and doesn't seem to act like they are all that sacred. You have self confidence issues and are continually greatful to have her. She takes you for granted, like she has relationship-to-spare. To top it all off, she works at a bar where she is constantly reminded by attractive men that she has all the options in the world. (If you were less greatful for your relationship and worked at a place with 20 drunk hot women slapping your ass and inviting you into bed with them how would it affect you?)
You dont fight very much but you always feel like you are having to walk on your tippy toes not to piss her off. She gets mad (or is it upset?) often, and although there are very few harsh words, on those occasions there are very few words at all. You prefer not to fight (most likely because you are uncomfortable with confrontation) and are quick to just swallow your pride and apologize, just to appease her. Its always about her needs not yours, and shes always in control because youd rather just let her have her way than let whatever it is escalate into a fight. You spend alot of your time complimenting her and giving her your approval. She takes this for granted.
In my experience, women want your approval. But if they already have it just handed to them, there is no challange and they eventually get bored with you (If you give your approval away for free it seems worthless). Bringing this back to a childish dating game level, if it was me, I would take this approval away from her for a week or so. Don't compliment her, don't look at her like shes sexy, dont try to make her feel special. It might be really hard to resist doing these things as they seem so natural to you. Don't be mean to her at all, just be indifferent. Show her that she has been taking your attention for granted. When she asks you whats wrong act like you dont know what shes talking about. Set a time limit on this, and even if she trys to rape you before the time limit is up it just means its working, dont give in till your time is up, make up an excuse that you have to clean out the gutters and its really important or something.
I bet you pride yourself on your ability to avoid fighting. But fighting to you means "yelling" and to her it means being cross with each other. I know it seems backwards, but you should not be afraid to yell at her some time if she does something offensive to you. How often does she yell at you? You are allowed to yell at her that much (or even only half that much). This does two things, 1 it shows her that you are strong and its not ok to dick you around and 2 fights are necessary, they are oppurtunities to communicate things that can never be brought up when you are "being nice" to each other. You can just forget about these things because you are a guy, but for her they just steam in her brain if she doesn't get a chance to let them out. So she gets upset and never really gets to express it. When she told you she wanted to seperate, I bet she (if not conciously then subconciously) was trying to get you to fight with her (just once for goodness sakes!) and when you just remained calm and detatched, what did she say? "This is exactly how I thought you would respond"
How far off am I?
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