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dy156 · 09-13-2004, 05:34 AM

On some other thread I talked about this before, but there are alot of new people here and thought (perhaps conceitedly) that y'all'd benefit from my $.02.

I was a Beta, but my greek experience, or how I decided to do it was anything but typical. No wild parties the summer after high school and no house experience. (no fraternity houses allowed at that school)

My sophomore year, I had just broken up with my girlfriend, was worried that I'd be kicked out of my program and lose my scholarship, had just wrecked my car, and had no idea where I was going to live when I drove off to school that August. The prof. in charge of the program was not getting back from Israel until about October, so I was in limbo on that. I had two good friends from Freshmen year, and one was transferring for money reasons, and the other was going to be gone the fall semester abroad. I was supposed to live with a group of guys in this house that was being renovated over the summer. Somehow, it got condemned by the city while it was being gutted, and they had just got that lifted, but hadn't finished and it was unlivable.

So I crashed on a friend's couch for a couple of weeks, and when classes started, I kept running into this guy and he kept bugging me about it. It was a group of guys that had gotten together the year before and decided to start their own, and shopped around for the best national fraternity that was not on campus. Thinking what the hell, got nothing to lose, I accepted the bid. Even though I was a little leary of joining a group that was struggling to establish itself, that was part o0f what attracted me too. Yes, there was hazing, in part because these guys were so inexperienced and wanted to do a better job of everything they had heard about before, with the exception of alcohol hazing (for the most part). On the other hand, I got my grades up and got my life back in order by the end of the semester, and almost as a bonus, was in a fraternity.

I think fraternities can help two kinds of people the most; those who arein need of social initiative have an excuse to ask girls out for parties or dates and always have a place to sit in the cafeteria, something to do on weekends, etc..; those that take a leadership role also get great experience in coordinating/fighting/negotiating with business sponsors/alumni/school administration that they would be hard-pressed to replicate in a non-greek setting.
Now that I'm out of school, I recall fondly my college days and the wild times we had. That one little throw-away line on a resume is good too, and was an immediate interview icebreaker. What I'm most thankful for, though, are the couples we still hang out with. Quite a few of my old fraternity brothers are married and have embarked on successful carreers, and those that we live around continue to spend time together. We don't talk about fraternity stuff anymore, and we don't pay dues. It's a great network of people for dinners, weddings, golf, and help with home improvement projects. That's really nice to have when you're young and trying to get started living in the big city.
I don't necessarily think that any national fraternity is better than the others to join. There'll be some hazing probably, and some dues you have to pay to keep things running. There'll be some "secret ceremonies" that are cheesey. But I strongly encourage you to not pass up an opportunity just because you buy into "I don't pay for my friends" propaganda. It's almost reverse snobbishness. Everyone talks about having an open mind, except when it comes to things like this. There is a strong anti-fraternity/sorority bias that exists, but I just hope that for your sake, you don't buy into it.

09-13-2004, 05:34 AM	#62 (permalink)
dy156 cookie Location: in the backwoods	On some other thread I talked about this before, but there are alot of new people here and thought (perhaps conceitedly) that y'all'd benefit from my $.02. I was a Beta, but my greek experience, or how I decided to do it was anything but typical. No wild parties the summer after high school and no house experience. (no fraternity houses allowed at that school) My sophomore year, I had just broken up with my girlfriend, was worried that I'd be kicked out of my program and lose my scholarship, had just wrecked my car, and had no idea where I was going to live when I drove off to school that August. The prof. in charge of the program was not getting back from Israel until about October, so I was in limbo on that. I had two good friends from Freshmen year, and one was transferring for money reasons, and the other was going to be gone the fall semester abroad. I was supposed to live with a group of guys in this house that was being renovated over the summer. Somehow, it got condemned by the city while it was being gutted, and they had just got that lifted, but hadn't finished and it was unlivable. So I crashed on a friend's couch for a couple of weeks, and when classes started, I kept running into this guy and he kept bugging me about it. It was a group of guys that had gotten together the year before and decided to start their own, and shopped around for the best national fraternity that was not on campus. Thinking what the hell, got nothing to lose, I accepted the bid. Even though I was a little leary of joining a group that was struggling to establish itself, that was part o0f what attracted me too. Yes, there was hazing, in part because these guys were so inexperienced and wanted to do a better job of everything they had heard about before, with the exception of alcohol hazing (for the most part). On the other hand, I got my grades up and got my life back in order by the end of the semester, and almost as a bonus, was in a fraternity. I think fraternities can help two kinds of people the most; those who arein need of social initiative have an excuse to ask girls out for parties or dates and always have a place to sit in the cafeteria, something to do on weekends, etc..; those that take a leadership role also get great experience in coordinating/fighting/negotiating with business sponsors/alumni/school administration that they would be hard-pressed to replicate in a non-greek setting. Now that I'm out of school, I recall fondly my college days and the wild times we had. That one little throw-away line on a resume is good too, and was an immediate interview icebreaker. What I'm most thankful for, though, are the couples we still hang out with. Quite a few of my old fraternity brothers are married and have embarked on successful carreers, and those that we live around continue to spend time together. We don't talk about fraternity stuff anymore, and we don't pay dues. It's a great network of people for dinners, weddings, golf, and help with home improvement projects. That's really nice to have when you're young and trying to get started living in the big city. I don't necessarily think that any national fraternity is better than the others to join. There'll be some hazing probably, and some dues you have to pay to keep things running. There'll be some "secret ceremonies" that are cheesey. But I strongly encourage you to not pass up an opportunity just because you buy into "I don't pay for my friends" propaganda. It's almost reverse snobbishness. Everyone talks about having an open mind, except when it comes to things like this. There is a strong anti-fraternity/sorority bias that exists, but I just hope that for your sake, you don't buy into it.