View Single Post
Old 09-03-2004, 11:59 AM   #87 (permalink)
powerclown
Junkie
 
powerclown's Avatar
 
Location: Detroit, MI
If this happened in America:
1 - the media (local & foreign) would descend on the scene like piranhas in heat.
2 - the building would be surrounded by an army reserve battalion.
3 - jesse jackson would arrive in a limo with his posse, all in black ray-bans.
4 - geraldo would arrive via helicopter.
5 - oprah would hold a 'Village Congregation' with the relatives of the hostages. much emotion and venting.
6 - an unknown local would get shot and wounded trying to steal away one of the hostages, in the process becoming a nationwide folk hero and appearing on mainstream magazine covers.
7 - president bush would declare a state of emergency. would remain on campaign trail.
8 - john kerry would call for establishing an immediate dialougue with the hostages. would pipe blankets, food, water and toliet paper into the school.
9 - washington would consult with israel as to methods of approach.
10 - john ashcroft appears on the morning talk shows, puts america back to sleep.
11 - terrorist-alert awareness' programs adopted in schools & universities across america, spearheaded by tom ridge & homeland security.
12 - standoff unceremoniously drags on into Day 47.
13 - shaq offers to give the families of the hostages $3 million.
14 - unmanned drones fly 24-7 surveillance runs over school, pissing off locals with the noise. one mysteriously shot down, cause unknown. lands in mayor's pool. now mayor pissed, too.
15 - wag photog snipes a fuzzy pic of the terrorist leader as he runs by window. image manipulation experts called in from around the globe...cnn allots 6 hours a night to interview experts and bring up wild hypotheticals. zapruder film referenced.
16 - standoff unceremoniously drags on into Day 73. a few kids manage to escape by squeezing into ventilation ducts.
17 - infighting amongst hostage takers, rebellion sets in. battalion snipers reportedly kill 18 'terrorists'. validity disputed - possibly civilian casualites?
18 - a movie script is passed around hollywood studios.
19 - world looks on in wonder.
20 - On Day 112, kidnapper's demands met; town renamed 'freedom city'.



edit: let me just say that I posted this nonsense before I heard that 200 people, women & children, died today in the school. I didn't mean to be grossly insensitive, just stupidly satirical; mods delete if desired.

Last edited by powerclown; 09-03-2004 at 03:49 PM..
powerclown is offline  
 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360