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Fair enough. In fact, most of the scholastics (read: monks) also knew that the world was round; Columbus was actually wrong -- he thought it was shaped like a pear. But that's beside the point. I don't know off-hand exactly what they thought about how directly God was involved in the reproductive act, but since Aquinas was heavily influenced by Aristotle, it's reasonable to suspect that he had similar views on reproduction. And before you object about my citing the learned people, remember that these people are where the church got its views from; it didn't just make them up haphazardly.
So, the argument of the church goes roughly as follows. The sex act has two functions, a procreative and a unitive function. Disordered sex acts are those which do not serve these functions. Porn serves neither of these functions, therefore jerking off to pornography is a disordered sex act. (Note: there's a similar argument against just looking at porn, but it's a bit more complicated, so I'll leave it as an exercise for the reader.) So to buy that argument, all you really need is a teleological account of human nature along with certain beliefs about the nature of the sex act, not some mysterious belief about the 'sacredness' of sex.
And in fact, the idea of the sacredness of sex is not something I would reject quite so out of hand. It does seem to be more closely tied to our being than something like eating or shitting, so not merely another natural function. And Christians aren't the only ones ruing it's demystification. Foucault, in "A Preface to Transgression", bitterly rues the "denaturation" of sex. So one does not need to share Christian views of sex to think of sex as something special.
Finally, you argue that the idea that viewing porn leads to negative behavior is comparable to the idea that playing violent video games leads to negative behavior. But in fact, the studies done on playing violent video games have been inconclusive, while the studies done on the effects of porn have tended to show that it does in fact have a negative effect on ones relationships.
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"Die Deutschen meinen, daß die Kraft sich in Härte und Grausamkeit offenbaren müsse, sie unterwerfen sich dann gerne und mit Bewunderung:[...]. Daß es Kraft giebt in der Milde und Stille, das glauben sie nicht leicht."
"The Germans believe that power must reveal itself in hardness and cruelty and then submit themselves gladly and with admiration[...]. They do not believe readily that there is power in meekness and calm."
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
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