Squishor

I read your post with great appreciation, Cedar, and you should know that you speak for others too. I laughed out loud when I read the part about, "Yes, I know it's different when they're your own..."

I had my tubes tied and I really should have done it 20 years earlier. I tried when I was 17 but couldn't find a doctor who would even consider it. I don't like kids, don't generally enjoy being around them, and know that I don't want to grow one - in fact the whole idea of pregnancy and childbirth seems repulsive to me, even though I know it's supposed to be beautiful. I will be happy going through life without having to teach anybody how to wipe their own ass. I've been told that this makes me less of a woman. I have also been (repeatedly) told that I was once a child myself. Do they say that to you too? How is that relevant to my decision to breed or not as an adult?

So when I was finally at my local family planning clinic, having thought it over very seriously every day for two years straight, I told the doctor this and she treated me like I was making a mistake she needed to talk me out of. I couldn't believe it, and pointed out that I was nearly 40 and wouldn't even be fertile all that much longer. I reminded her that I was beyond the stage they call "adult" and moving into middle age. I had to explain all my reasons and only got her reluctant blessing, and left with hard feelings. At what point does it become acceptable for a grown woman in command of all her senses to make her own decision about childbearing? Not at 39, so I was told that day, by a doctor at Planned Parenthood no less. I don't quite understand this weird fixation on making more babies when we clearly have too many already.

The good news is, I haven't had to worry about birth control for over a year now, and it feels great! Like I said, I only wish I had done it 20 years ago.