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SecretMethod70 · 08-04-2004, 06:49 AM

I've thought about this quite a bit - I can be pretty anal about sex equality. I've come to the conclusion that the only thing that preserves the equality of both sides is changing the name entirely. I'm not sure 100% that I'd go for it necessarily, but it's definitely the best way. It would be nice if that were simply how it was done - no extended family getting upset, no one side giving up more than the other, and the entire immediate family still has the same last name.

Here were my basic thoughts regarding this:

Traditional - bad for obvious reasons
Converse Traditional - no better than above
Female Hyphenated - the female is stuck with a hyphenated name, while the male takes on nothing of the female's. Do the kids have the hyphenated name? What happens when they get married (assuming they go for the "fair" solution as well), more hyphenation?
Dual Hyphenated - which name goes first and gets priority?
New and Unique Name - neither spouse gets priority based on sex. The name (ideally) is chosen by both and is yet another representation of their new life together. Children share the new name, preserving the traditional nuclear family naming convention. As a new standard, this works because the children will also choose a new name when they are married, thus eliminating sexist tradition as well as resisting inelegant solutions.

----

As for being "down" on traditions, it's really not the case. Names are arbitrary in the first place and, thus, there's no reason to have any convention that favors one thing over the other. Giving a man's, OR a woman's name priority is simply a completely unnecessary form of sexism.

08-04-2004, 06:49 AM	#4 (permalink)
SecretMethod70 Human Administrator Location: Chicago	I've thought about this quite a bit - I can be pretty anal about sex equality. I've come to the conclusion that the only thing that preserves the equality of both sides is changing the name entirely. I'm not sure 100% that I'd go for it necessarily, but it's definitely the best way. It would be nice if that were simply how it was done - no extended family getting upset, no one side giving up more than the other, and the entire immediate family still has the same last name. Here were my basic thoughts regarding this: Traditional - bad for obvious reasons Converse Traditional - no better than above Female Hyphenated - the female is stuck with a hyphenated name, while the male takes on nothing of the female's. Do the kids have the hyphenated name? What happens when they get married (assuming they go for the "fair" solution as well), more hyphenation? Dual Hyphenated - which name goes first and gets priority? New and Unique Name - neither spouse gets priority based on sex. The name (ideally) is chosen by both and is yet another representation of their new life together. Children share the new name, preserving the traditional nuclear family naming convention. As a new standard, this works because the children will also choose a new name when they are married, thus eliminating sexist tradition as well as resisting inelegant solutions. ---- As for being "down" on traditions, it's really not the case. Names are arbitrary in the first place and, thus, there's no reason to have any convention that favors one thing over the other. Giving a man's, OR a woman's name priority is simply a completely unnecessary form of sexism. __________________ Le temps détruit tout "Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling Last edited by SecretMethod70; 08-04-2004 at 06:52 AM..