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Cynthetiq · 08-03-2004, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by roachboy
cynthetiq:

i know the definition of this "american dream" thing.

what i cannot figure out is why it is compelling.

if you are framing this as a first generation in the states thing, then fine, maybe for you the story is important: for me, it is not.

this is not because i have any opinion about the difficulties that are built into your story, and the stories of other folk from parallel family pasts that have posted echoes of your statement at the start of the thread--it is good that you have worked things out for yourself. my interests lie elsewhere: i have a very different experience than you do, i expect.

one result of this experience is that i do not see what possible linkage there is between who a person is, what they do, what they care about, and the commodities they surround themselves with. are you a different person with a swank car than you are without one? does having a swank car shift your interests? do you become your swank car? do you become a better person because you have a swank car? better than you were before? better than those who cannot afford such a car?

if this american dream thing is, underneath it, about hollowing yourself out to such an extent that you see yourself entirely in the objects that you purchase, then i do not understand how the price of playing the game--asking whether you are or are not living this dream--is worth it. why would you do it? why would you see commodities---which any nitwit can accumulate given adequate cash/credit--as in themselves validation of who you are, of your family and their struggles to situate themselves?

seems to me like the struggles are worth more than that.
and that it is kind of a problem to reduce their meaning to having a gas grill or a huge refrigerator.

maybe the problem with this american dream thing is that it is primarily a marketing device. maybe the problem with thinking that you are living it is that you are living a marketing device.

why is it compelling?

because to most people they could never own a home, they could never be a boss, they could never own a business.

Does it make you a different person? For some, it may corrupt, for other is may turn them into community benefactors, and others it may not change them at all.

It isn't about "buying" or "materialism" it's about the ability to be better off than where you were.

Looking back 14 years ago, when I left LA I did not own a home, I did own a Toyota Corolla 4dr (i've always driven modest cars) I did only work 3 days a month and pulled in abou $40k/year. I partied every day, had a boat and went waterskiing and boating when I could. But looking around, I never thought I could ever afford my own home.

When I struck out to NY, I looked around and found that I could not afford to eat at most restaurants and would have to have several roommates in order to rent in an apartment as I only made $4.35/hour. As my career continued to move upwards and my salary with it, but I still always thought I would never be able to afford to buy something in Manhattan, so when I could afford something I bought a condo in Las Vegas near my parents place.

Last year, I was finally able to buy a place in Manhattan, reducing my commute from 1.5 hours to 40 minutes, 60 if I wanted to walk to work. My wife can walk to work in 20 if she wanted.

So now, my quality of life decreased when I left LA for a good 6-8 years. But now my quality of life is even better. Is it just buying stuff? No, it's not having to work so hard just to keep a roof over my head, and do whatever it is that I enjoy doing.