Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - How the hell am I going to do this? (relationship advice)

roofles · 07-28-2004, 05:14 PM

I'd have to agree with the general concensus here.

Perhaps you're misunderstanding what people here are getting at.

The fact that you habitually generate these contingency plans like this does not mean there is no sentiment behind them. What the case seeems to be is that you are a naturally distrustful person. Keep in mind that isn't necessarily a negative thing. I am the same way. Only trusting something when you have a contingency plan in place IS distrust. It is exactly as was said before here, trust is when there is no safety net AND regardless you aren't worried.

I'm the same way as you in respect to the incessant backup plans.

You NEED trust before anything else in a relationship. There is no way around this. A fundamental lack of trust in any relationship will constantly erode its base.

I would seriously reexamine your stance to your girl friend.

07-28-2004, 05:14 PM	#15 (permalink)
roofles Upright Location: San Diego	I'd have to agree with the general concensus here. Perhaps you're misunderstanding what people here are getting at. The fact that you habitually generate these contingency plans like this does not mean there is no sentiment behind them. What the case seeems to be is that you are a naturally distrustful person. Keep in mind that isn't necessarily a negative thing. I am the same way. Only trusting something when you have a contingency plan in place IS distrust. It is exactly as was said before here, trust is when there is no safety net AND regardless you aren't worried. I'm the same way as you in respect to the incessant backup plans. You NEED trust before anything else in a relationship. There is no way around this. A fundamental lack of trust in any relationship will constantly erode its base. I would seriously reexamine your stance to your girl friend.