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I'd probably be kicking myself in 20 years if I hadn't, saying things like "if I knew then what I know now..." and the like.
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I don't see why. I have turned down several "opportunities" in the past few years, and I have no regrets about it.
I don't know if this whole situation that you're describing means that much to you, your girlfriend, or her friend but I suggest that you do think about it. What I find curious is that there was a history leading up to this of her telling you that she wanted to have her best friend involved. Why did she want her best friend involved so much? Why did she agree?
What are you going to do if she wants to include her best friend again?
I'm of a small minority here that feels differently about what sex should be used for that you could figure out from my other posts. I certainly suggest that you consider the meaning of these actions and what you want sex to mean for you, as well as having a discussion about what you want sex to mean with your girlfriend.