I wish to reiterate that servers live on their tips. Last summer working at Red Lobster, my paychecks for 35-40 hours were usually less than $1 because of taxes, so tips were my income. I know that the servers who had insurance through the restaurant never got a paycheck, they had to pay money, so yeah they lived on tips.
If you don't like the system, then don't go out to eat. No matter what, you have to pay for your service, personally I would rather be in control of how much to pay rather than have the restaurant charge me more to eat and pay their employees more.
By the way, take out people at a place like Red Lobster make around $7-8, so unless you have a some special circumstances that would make them work harder than most of the time, I think $1-$2 should suffice for the tip. A lot of the time they use hostesses for that position, but sometimes its servers on busy days like superbowl sunday.
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