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you're like 18 right? You're thinking way too much (believe me I know because I do it too). Do what makes you happy, no more no less.
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Patriotism means being loyal to your country all the time and to its government when it deserves it.
--Mark Twain
Do What makes you happy
--Me
BUT!
"Happiness is the absence of the striving for happiness" - Chuang-Tzu
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