"Miss Thunder Thighs"
A long long time ago, I can still remember
How being thin used to make be smile.
And I know that if I had my chance,
I could wear a size three pants,
And I might be happy, for a while.
Does this make my butt look big?
And do I eat like a big fat pig?
If my best friend tells me so.
Now are you a sexy toothpick?
Or are you a sexy bread stick?
Or are you just a big fat candlewick?
Well I know I have a pretzel butt,
Just like you have a beluga gut.
We both will tip the scales,
Both the size of whales.
I'm sure that you'll never buy it,
But I swear that I'm on a diet,
Even though I've already tried it.
The day
I broke
The scale...
I started singing:
Bye bye Miss Thunder Thighs,
You're more heavy than a Chevy,
And I swear it's not a lie.
My best friend's even fatter than I,
Singing, "This will be the day I give up pie.
This will be the day I give up pie."
I met a girl, who never ate,
I guess you could say that it was fate.
Dieting, I could fake.
Well I decided to give up food,
Anything that had to be chewed,
But I did have the occasional shake.
On occasion I did break a seam,
But I got closer to my dream.
But not a word was spoken,
I lost weight I'm not jokin'.
And my best friend, she remained fat,
What could one think of that?
It was embarrassing to be her friend
The day
She broke
The scale....
I started singing:
Bye bye Miss Thunder Thighs,
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
|