Quote:
Originally posted by zounds
Just because you trust your girlfriend or wife doesnt mean she won't cheat on you. People give in to temptation all the time - even the most trustworthy and loyal people. Even if you think "She would NEVER..." , things have a funny way of playing out sometimes. And as far as I'm concerned, any guy with a healthy libido cannot be good friends with a girl without thinking about having sex with her.
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It's true, anyone can say they'll never cheat and then proceed to cheat, but in my relationships (been cheated on once, but there was a whole karma thing going on there) I've always trusted the other person.
If my partner has lots of male friends, and I don't consider them my friends, then she's the one I trust. I can be worried and paranoid as anything, but at the end of the day, as far as I'm concerned, until she cheats then it's a non-issue. Once she cheats there's no reason to stick around, but until that happens, it's the same whether she has male friends or not.
As I said, she's the one I trust until it's broken, not until I start getting paranoid thoughts. In that case it's me that's causing the problem by distrusting her, even though the only cheating going on is in my paranoid imagination.
About what coyote said, I think that's where the line is between 'her' male friends and 'our' male friends. If she were to take off her clothes and say "Do me" to her male friend while she's in a relationship, and shennanigans commenced, then I don't blame the guy. Well, I do, but I never had a bond of trust with him, did I? I had that bond of trust with my partner and she broke it by doing that.
If the male friends are 'our' male friends, rather than 'hers', then I think it's a bit different. The bond of trust between partners has been broken, as has the one between friends, and then I don't see any reason why those people are a girlfriend and a friend anymore.