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Redjake · 05-22-2004, 04:36 PM

OH MY GOD it's story time. I haven't had this good of a story in a while so listen up: As you may or may not know, we live (me and my brother) in a small town in North Carolina. I'll keep the name out for now. Anyway, it's basically redneck-central. I'm not ashamed to admit it. I mean, hell, I have some redneck in me. We all do from around here. I have a vicious southern accent mixed with a northern accent on some words.

So my sister just recently got her license (she's 16) and we are going to go and meet my parents at the local park for a picnic. How sweet. Well, the sweet ain't as sweet without the sour.....

So me, my brother, and my sister (driving) go to mcdonald's to pick up some REAL food for a picnic. We get the food, and are prepared to pull out into the road to get our way to the park. Well, at 6-7 PM in my hometown, the main road is crowded as hell. So any spot that is open you have to take. So there is a gap, and I tell my sister "go for it, and floor it." So she pulls out and with her 4 cylinder car (with me, my brother and her in it) she is having a hard time getting up to speed. I won't lie, she pulled out in front of a truck, but the truck, if it was traveling at a decent rate of speed (35-40 MPH, the speed limit in downtown) we would have had PLENTY of room to go. I'm not distorting the facts here at all...I want you guys to hear it as it happened.

So the truck was in actuality traveling at approximately 50 MPH and it has to slam on its brakes to avoid hitting us. Instead of us being sorry about it and him passing us in the other lane, he decides to rev his engine and speed up to 55-60 MPH and overtake us while blowing the horn. I mean he missed us by inches folks....almost took off the side mirror.

Me and Lasereth have a bit of a temper, as you see by us constantly arguing in the computing forums about whatever. Lasereth's long and drawn out posts show this

So I tell my sister to keep going as usual and if we get beside him or he stops, we are going to call him a motherfucker and give him the finger. *DISCLAIMER* DO NOT DO THIS. SEE BELOW FOR REST OF STORY. */DISCLAIMER*

So he stops to get gas, right where we are going to turn as a matter of fact. So he is getting gas and we turn and my sister blows the horn and I yell MOTHERFUCKER!!!! and Lasereth gives him a good ol' fashioned Middle Finger. We agree that he got owned and should learn some manners. We head to the park.

We pull into the park, and somehow the guy (must have quit fueling right then and there) caught up to us. He pulls into the park, and tries to RAM us. I shit you not. The backend of his truck slid around and I yelled for my sister to FLOOR it. If she wouldn't have hit the gas, he would have hit us. Lasereth would be in the hospital. So they guy (in his macho Ford F-350 Super Duty) pulls around us and CUTS US OFF before we can leave the park. Then he sticks his head out of the window and says something alone the lines of "get the fuck out."

So me, in my straw hat, ask what the problem is. He starts cussing immediately. He gets OUT of his truck. This is when I get nervous. What if he has a fuckin' Nine. Or hell, what if he is going to cut us. But then my temper kicks in. Especially Lasereth's. Who the fuck does he think he is fucking our family? My sister is 16, just got her license. People make mistakes.

So Lasereth says that the guy is making a big deal out of nothing and the guy is like GET OUT. Lasereth doesn't want to pay a lawyer so he says no. The guy beckons. GET OUT. So I am like oh Jesus we are going to fucking rumble.

Then I realize that this guy is a 30 year old male. We are 2 20 year old males. We can fucking take him. We weigh (each) at least 100 lbs more than him. We aren't overly fat, but we are stocky enough to not fuck with. I work out.

So Lasereth is like "sorry man, just be on your way." And the guy is like SHUT UP. GET THE FUCK OUT. I am like man this guy is gonna try some shit. My sister is crying at this point, and the guy then calls us all fools and says my sister won't have her license long if she keeps up that shit. I'm sure he NEVER pulled out in front of someone who was going 50 in a 35 before and had to floor it. I'm sure he never gave anyone the finger for anything.

This guy interupts us for anything we say. We can't explain ANYTHING to him! He just says SHUT UP if we open our mouths to explain what happened.

At that point I'm thinking, my dad and stepmom and baby sister are gonna be here for the picnic soon. I hope my dad gets here in time before some serious shit happens. The guy beckons again. GET OUT. Then my brother says I'll call the fucking cops if you say it again. So the guy goes and grabs his phone and is like I'LL FUCKING CALL 'EM! I am thinking "this guy is stupid. The cops are a fucking savior at this point."

So he is pushing the phone in my face like "I'll DO IT!! I'LL CALL THE COPS!" and I am like fine, call.

So the guy keeps yelling "GET OUT GET OUT." My sister says "Why do you want them to get out?" The guys looks dumbfounded. He might have, for one split second, realized what he was doing...

I forgot to mention this bitch was in our face the entire time. At one point, he had his grasp (both hands) on the window at my sister's drivers side. He did the same to Lasereth. Grabbing the fucking car yelling down our faces. Lasreth tells the guy to let go of the fucking car. The guys says no. Lasereth tells the guy to "go the hell away." The guy says he is gonna hurt Lasereth. Lasereth said if he touches him then he is gonna fuck his face up bad. So then it just took one more time.

"GET OUT." So then, all of a sudden, I see my Dad driving up. He was about 1/4 down the road. He has his concealed weapon permit and carries a glock. So I say "you just FUCKED UP. YOU WANT TO PLAY ROUGH?????? YOU FUCKING FUCKD UP!!!!!THAT'S MY FUCKING DAD AND YOU ARE GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!!!!"

(later I figure out by some bystanders across the road that I cuss a lot louder than I realize)

So me and Lasereth get out and I run around the car hands a flailing in fury, cussing up a storm and the guy is like "what, so both of you now?" And we are like "hell yeah. Let's fucking go. Throw a punch."

My Dad pulls up and he looks fucking pissed. The guy is like IS THAT YOUR DAD??? And I am like HELL YEAH IT IS.

My dad rolls down the window and says "what's the problem?" The guy says "ARE THESE YOUR KIDS???"

My Dad says "yeah, what's the matter? Did the cars make contact? Did she hit you? Did you hit her?"

The guys says "no..."

My Dad says "Then LEAVE! What are you doing here? LEAVE. JUST LEAVE! There's no point in you being here! Leave!"

The guys says "Hell no I'm not leaving!" MY Dad says "we have a BABY in the back of my truck here. Watch the language. And leave."

The guys says "naw man I ain't leavin' she don't know how to fuckin' DRIVE!"

My dad TEARS OFF his seatbelt and opens the truck door. I forgot to mention he is 6'6", 375 lbs.

The guys looks at me, Lasereth, and my Dad. My dad YELLS. "LEAVE. NOW. GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY KIDS!!!!!!"

The guy backs up some. He has this "I'm scared shitless" look on his face. He says "Man fuck this I'm callin' the cops."

"CALL 'EM!" my Dad says. So he did. My dad did too. We pulled down into the parking lot more. The cops came, and basically said we shouldn't have flicked the guy off but it was more his fault than ours. That he lost his temper and over-reacted. They were acting like "I can't believe this idiot did this." We all got out without a citation or anything. The police said we shouldn't worry about the guy anymore, ever. They must have said something to him quite serious.

A couple of morals in this story:

1. Even if you are 20 years old, and the guy you are getting ready to fight is 30-40 years old, having a parent in the matter is the most comforting thing in the world. Always treat your parents good (luckily I have) so if situations like this arise, they don't take shit. They back you up no matter what. When my Dad stepped out of the truck (a la Robocop...one foot out, heavy thud on the ground) and that redneck motherfucker stepped back, I felt like thanking God to be alive.

2. Get a fucking concealed permit. This guy, I believe, would have tried to fucking KILL us if my Dad didn't pull up. I looked in his eyes...he looked fucking insane. When I graduate college, I am going to train to get my concealed weapon permit and I WILL carry a gun at all times. *DISCLAIMER* yadaa yadda more violence blah blah....I know. If you know anything about the concealed permits, you know that the gun is the very last resort (a.k.a. he is killing you). I realize that and would abide by it */DISCLAIMER*

3. Road rage is more apparent in small towns than big towns. In the "big town" up the road (30 mins away), you flick them off, they tell you to fuck off, and that's it. In my southern baptist town of Whiteness, they kill you.

4. Don't flick people off.

5. Be confident, but not overly confident. If me and Lasereth wouldn't have kept our cool (while being confident and reassuring of an asswhooping if he tried anything) he would have ran all over us (verbally AND physically).

6. For God's sakes, DON'T BE THAT GUY. It's not worth it! I'd never chase somebody fucking down. What a fucking moron. Now I have to worry if he is gonna slash my tires or something.

7. Don't get in the way of a parent and his kids. At least not my Dad.

Redjake out.

05-22-2004, 04:36 PM	#1 (permalink)
Redjake I'm a family man - I run a family business. Location: Wilson, NC	Simply Incredible OH MY GOD it's story time. I haven't had this good of a story in a while so listen up: As you may or may not know, we live (me and my brother) in a small town in North Carolina. I'll keep the name out for now. Anyway, it's basically redneck-central. I'm not ashamed to admit it. I mean, hell, I have some redneck in me. We all do from around here. I have a vicious southern accent mixed with a northern accent on some words. So my sister just recently got her license (she's 16) and we are going to go and meet my parents at the local park for a picnic. How sweet. Well, the sweet ain't as sweet without the sour..... So me, my brother, and my sister (driving) go to mcdonald's to pick up some REAL food for a picnic. We get the food, and are prepared to pull out into the road to get our way to the park. Well, at 6-7 PM in my hometown, the main road is crowded as hell. So any spot that is open you have to take. So there is a gap, and I tell my sister "go for it, and floor it." So she pulls out and with her 4 cylinder car (with me, my brother and her in it) she is having a hard time getting up to speed. I won't lie, she pulled out in front of a truck, but the truck, if it was traveling at a decent rate of speed (35-40 MPH, the speed limit in downtown) we would have had PLENTY of room to go. I'm not distorting the facts here at all...I want you guys to hear it as it happened. So the truck was in actuality traveling at approximately 50 MPH and it has to slam on its brakes to avoid hitting us. Instead of us being sorry about it and him passing us in the other lane, he decides to rev his engine and speed up to 55-60 MPH and overtake us while blowing the horn. I mean he missed us by inches folks....almost took off the side mirror. Me and Lasereth have a bit of a temper, as you see by us constantly arguing in the computing forums about whatever. Lasereth's long and drawn out posts show this So I tell my sister to keep going as usual and if we get beside him or he stops, we are going to call him a motherfucker and give him the finger. DISCLAIMER DO NOT DO THIS. SEE BELOW FOR REST OF STORY. /DISCLAIMER So he stops to get gas, right where we are going to turn as a matter of fact. So he is getting gas and we turn and my sister blows the horn and I yell MOTHERFUCKER!!!! and Lasereth gives him a good ol' fashioned Middle Finger. We agree that he got owned and should learn some manners. We head to the park. We pull into the park, and somehow the guy (must have quit fueling right then and there) caught up to us. He pulls into the park, and tries to RAM us. I shit you not. The backend of his truck slid around and I yelled for my sister to FLOOR it. If she wouldn't have hit the gas, he would have hit us. Lasereth would be in the hospital. So they guy (in his macho Ford F-350 Super Duty) pulls around us and CUTS US OFF before we can leave the park. Then he sticks his head out of the window and says something alone the lines of "get the fuck out." So me, in my straw hat, ask what the problem is. He starts cussing immediately. He gets OUT of his truck. This is when I get nervous. What if he has a fuckin' Nine. Or hell, what if he is going to cut us. But then my temper kicks in. Especially Lasereth's. Who the fuck does he think he is fucking our family? My sister is 16, just got her license. People make mistakes. So Lasereth says that the guy is making a big deal out of nothing and the guy is like GET OUT. Lasereth doesn't want to pay a lawyer so he says no. The guy beckons. GET OUT. So I am like oh Jesus we are going to fucking rumble. Then I realize that this guy is a 30 year old male. We are 2 20 year old males. We can fucking take him. We weigh (each) at least 100 lbs more than him. We aren't overly fat, but we are stocky enough to not fuck with. I work out. So Lasereth is like "sorry man, just be on your way." And the guy is like SHUT UP. GET THE FUCK OUT. I am like man this guy is gonna try some shit. My sister is crying at this point, and the guy then calls us all fools and says my sister won't have her license long if she keeps up that shit. I'm sure he NEVER pulled out in front of someone who was going 50 in a 35 before and had to floor it. I'm sure he never gave anyone the finger for anything. This guy interupts us for anything we say. We can't explain ANYTHING to him! He just says SHUT UP if we open our mouths to explain what happened. At that point I'm thinking, my dad and stepmom and baby sister are gonna be here for the picnic soon. I hope my dad gets here in time before some serious shit happens. The guy beckons again. GET OUT. Then my brother says I'll call the fucking cops if you say it again. So the guy goes and grabs his phone and is like I'LL FUCKING CALL 'EM! I am thinking "this guy is stupid. The cops are a fucking savior at this point." So he is pushing the phone in my face like "I'll DO IT!! I'LL CALL THE COPS!" and I am like fine, call. So the guy keeps yelling "GET OUT GET OUT." My sister says "Why do you want them to get out?" The guys looks dumbfounded. He might have, for one split second, realized what he was doing... I forgot to mention this bitch was in our face the entire time. At one point, he had his grasp (both hands) on the window at my sister's drivers side. He did the same to Lasereth. Grabbing the fucking car yelling down our faces. Lasreth tells the guy to let go of the fucking car. The guys says no. Lasereth tells the guy to "go the hell away." The guy says he is gonna hurt Lasereth. Lasereth said if he touches him then he is gonna fuck his face up bad. So then it just took one more time. "GET OUT." So then, all of a sudden, I see my Dad driving up. He was about 1/4 down the road. He has his concealed weapon permit and carries a glock. So I say "you just FUCKED UP. YOU WANT TO PLAY ROUGH?????? YOU FUCKING FUCKD UP!!!!!THAT'S MY FUCKING DAD AND YOU ARE GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!!!!" (later I figure out by some bystanders across the road that I cuss a lot louder than I realize) So me and Lasereth get out and I run around the car hands a flailing in fury, cussing up a storm and the guy is like "what, so both of you now?" And we are like "hell yeah. Let's fucking go. Throw a punch." My Dad pulls up and he looks fucking pissed. The guy is like IS THAT YOUR DAD??? And I am like HELL YEAH IT IS. My dad rolls down the window and says "what's the problem?" The guy says "ARE THESE YOUR KIDS???" My Dad says "yeah, what's the matter? Did the cars make contact? Did she hit you? Did you hit her?" The guys says "no..." My Dad says "Then LEAVE! What are you doing here? LEAVE. JUST LEAVE! There's no point in you being here! Leave!" The guys says "Hell no I'm not leaving!" MY Dad says "we have a BABY in the back of my truck here. Watch the language. And leave." The guys says "naw man I ain't leavin' she don't know how to fuckin' DRIVE!" My dad TEARS OFF his seatbelt and opens the truck door. I forgot to mention he is 6'6", 375 lbs. The guys looks at me, Lasereth, and my Dad. My dad YELLS. "LEAVE. NOW. GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY KIDS!!!!!!" The guy backs up some. He has this "I'm scared shitless" look on his face. He says "Man fuck this I'm callin' the cops." "CALL 'EM!" my Dad says. So he did. My dad did too. We pulled down into the parking lot more. The cops came, and basically said we shouldn't have flicked the guy off but it was more his fault than ours. That he lost his temper and over-reacted. They were acting like "I can't believe this idiot did this." We all got out without a citation or anything. The police said we shouldn't worry about the guy anymore, ever. They must have said something to him quite serious. A couple of morals in this story: 1. Even if you are 20 years old, and the guy you are getting ready to fight is 30-40 years old, having a parent in the matter is the most comforting thing in the world. Always treat your parents good (luckily I have) so if situations like this arise, they don't take shit. They back you up no matter what. When my Dad stepped out of the truck (a la Robocop...one foot out, heavy thud on the ground) and that redneck motherfucker stepped back, I felt like thanking God to be alive. 2. Get a fucking concealed permit. This guy, I believe, would have tried to fucking KILL us if my Dad didn't pull up. I looked in his eyes...he looked fucking insane. When I graduate college, I am going to train to get my concealed weapon permit and I WILL carry a gun at all times. DISCLAIMER yadaa yadda more violence blah blah....I know. If you know anything about the concealed permits, you know that the gun is the very last resort (a.k.a. he is killing you). I realize that and would abide by it /DISCLAIMER 3. Road rage is more apparent in small towns than big towns. In the "big town" up the road (30 mins away), you flick them off, they tell you to fuck off, and that's it. In my southern baptist town of Whiteness, they kill you. 4. Don't flick people off. 5. Be confident, but not overly confident. If me and Lasereth wouldn't have kept our cool (while being confident and reassuring of an asswhooping if he tried anything) he would have ran all over us (verbally AND physically). 6. For God's sakes, DON'T BE THAT GUY. It's not worth it! I'd never chase somebody fucking down. What a fucking moron. Now I have to worry if he is gonna slash my tires or something. 7. Don't get in the way of a parent and his kids. At least not my Dad. Redjake out. __________________ Off the record, on the q.t., and very hush-hush.