I dont know of any programs out there that would tell you if someone is using the access point, but if you just make sure that none of your machines are and it is still sending out lots of data, there is a good chance someone is.
Enable WEP encryption, and if possible MAC address filtering. Especially the last one. That will stop anyone other than you from using it.
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"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws."
--Plato
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