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I forget, not everyone watches Howard.
There was a PETA protest going on in New York City and Howard invited three attractive PETA girls into his studio to voice their opinions. After they came in and started talking for a little bit Howard cut them off and threatened to kill various animals if they didn't do what he wanted. First one of them had to take off their top to save a pig, then it was two had to make out to save a fish, then to save a cockroach two had to take their tops off and make out.
This wasn't set up earilier though, these were actual PETA girls. During the credits they showed the girls later on during the day, painted as tigers and locked up in cages (some people might remember the picture of them long ago on Fark).
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One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink but then held it out over the beer and yelled "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU BASTARD!"
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