"Frustration" and "losing virginity" go hand in hand for me.
Much to my chagrin, I didn't lose it until I had finished grad school. I think I was about 24. I was not clueless, not unattractive, had been to a college my classmates were calling "camp hormone" (because of all the fucking going on). I was just wonderging why women kept rejecting me. I'm still wondering ... I guess I tried too hard or something. I don't look back on it as a decent experience -- the memories of how difficult it was (mid-1980s) to get someone to cooperate were, well, frustrating. Still are.
Since that occasion, I've deflowered a few women as well. I'd have to say, sex with a (female) virgin (as a male) isn't all it's cracked up to be. Mostly they lie there wondering if they're allowed to move, and even after four or five sessions they still didn't "loosen up" until they've had A DIFFERENT MALE PARTNER. The whole "am I doing it right" and "I don't know what feels good to me" things just got in the way. Maybe I'm picking the wrong women?
And I've dated a thirtysomething divorcee who hadn't had sex with anyone except her husband until me (hence, was a virgin at marriage) who says, categorically, her lack of sexual experience was one of the main motivating factors in driving her into a marriage that was a mistake, and driving her to stay in it despite the feeling of it being a mistake, because she didn't have any sensation (sexual or otherwise related to intimacy) to compare to.
I guess I'm making a call for greater sexual liberation among our young women. It sure would have made MY life a lot better ...
