What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fshhhh.
These two guys walk into a bar...the third one ducks.
Horrible, but two of my favorites 
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"...for though she was ordinary, she possessed health, wit, courage, charm, and cheerfulness. But because she was not beautiful, no one ever seemed to notice these other qualities, which is so often the way of the world."
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
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