Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - CONTEST: Excuses to prevent my in-laws from moving in with us

warrrreagl · 04-06-2004, 08:13 AM

::::CONTEST IS OVER::::

Here's the conclusion, folks.

My wife talked to her brother last night on the phone, and here's what she told him.
They are welcome to stay with us anytime as long as they understand all of the following:
1) The house is not baby-proof (and is actually kind of dangerous for a crawling infant) and we will not change anything.
2) Their dogs and cats cannot come; they must be boarded or put somewhere else. Our furniture, rugs, belongings are too valuable to be ruined by pets, and we have carefully raised our pets the way we want them to behave.
3) Being a musician, I practice piano and play music at all kinds of odd hours. Additionally, when I am working at home, there can be no outside noises or distractions (baby cries, TV, stereo, etc.).
4) They may only stay two weeks because:
A) Zoning laws will not permit multi-family dwellings in our neighborhood
B) We would lose single-family status on our home-owners policy
C) We are adopting a Canadian Lynx next month and it is crucial that they only bond with their primary family unit as kittens (which is her, me, two poodles, and two cats)
D) Based on our calculations, all of the "work" he wants to do on his property should only take two weeks. After that, he'll have to do the work while living in the property.
E) We have plans to entertain some of my co-workers next month, and they must be gone by then.

After hearing my wife's manifesto, my brother-in-law confessed that it might not be such a good idea, and he'll think of something else.

Based on my calculations, the Prize of Pride should be shared between all of the following TFPers:
Hanxter
MrSelfDestruct
JStrider
Tecoyah
Redjake
God of Thunder

And the Prize for the Biggest Fucking Laugh
Cynthetiq

04-06-2004, 08:13 AM	#75 (permalink)
warrrreagl pinche vato Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton	::::CONTEST IS OVER:::: Here's the conclusion, folks. My wife talked to her brother last night on the phone, and here's what she told him. They are welcome to stay with us anytime as long as they understand all of the following: 1) The house is not baby-proof (and is actually kind of dangerous for a crawling infant) and we will not change anything. 2) Their dogs and cats cannot come; they must be boarded or put somewhere else. Our furniture, rugs, belongings are too valuable to be ruined by pets, and we have carefully raised our pets the way we want them to behave. 3) Being a musician, I practice piano and play music at all kinds of odd hours. Additionally, when I am working at home, there can be no outside noises or distractions (baby cries, TV, stereo, etc.). 4) They may only stay two weeks because: A) Zoning laws will not permit multi-family dwellings in our neighborhood B) We would lose single-family status on our home-owners policy C) We are adopting a Canadian Lynx next month and it is crucial that they only bond with their primary family unit as kittens (which is her, me, two poodles, and two cats) D) Based on our calculations, all of the "work" he wants to do on his property should only take two weeks. After that, he'll have to do the work while living in the property. E) We have plans to entertain some of my co-workers next month, and they must be gone by then. After hearing my wife's manifesto, my brother-in-law confessed that it might not be such a good idea, and he'll think of something else. Based on my calculations, the Prize of Pride should be shared between all of the following TFPers: Hanxter MrSelfDestruct JStrider Tecoyah Redjake God of Thunder And the Prize for the Biggest Fucking Laugh Cynthetiq __________________ Living is easy with eyes closed. Last edited by warrrreagl; 04-06-2004 at 08:17 AM..