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i think you girls have it. it's a matter of choice.
as far as the men thing, i agree with what lisa said. further, i think financially it's also easier for them to be independent because men generally get paid more than women for the same work. a lot of times when women work it's assumed that she's the second income and so jobs which are generally occupied by women generally have lower salaries, and so it's generally harder to be independent (specifically financially so) on a woman's salary. but i think that just tells us all the more about how powerful we are to be saying that we can be independent.
i'm wondering too, though, is there something to be said for being dependent? i mean, from a game kind of standpoint. if you're "making it" on your own it shows that you've done what you're had to and you've been intelligent enough to get the job, save the money, support yourself in whatever ways, etc. But if you're being codependent, doesn't that show that you've had success too? you've had the intelligence to get someone to care for you to the point of taking care of you. i understand that this might not be so healthy, relying on someone else, but is your own independent life not as likely to crumble once in a while as your partner/supporter's support? I'm just kinda playing devil's advocate here. I've obviously been socialized to think that it's best to be independent, so it's hard for me to argue that other side. but i think it's a side that's fun to look at.
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"When I look down I just miss all the good stuff. And when I look up I just trip over things"
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