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i can't tell you how much i disagree with motdakasha. your wife has certainly demonstrated that she cannot be trusted, or at least is not above suspicion. she is your wife, you owe each other your complete allegience and transparency. if you are still sexually involved with her, don't be. not until you are certain about what is going on.
in these situations, i don't believe there is such a thing as invading a spouse's privacy. with regards to relationships, there is nothing that is healthy to keep private. the only thing that should be hidden should be anniversary celebration plans and christmas gifts.
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If you will not fight when your victory will be sure and not too costly, you may come to the moment when you will have to fight with all the odds against you and only a precarious chance for survival. There may even be a worse case. You may have to fight when there is no hope of victory, because it is better to perish than to live as slaves.
~ Winston Churchill
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