I think perhaps I know what you're saying now, but at first your views appear nihilistic.
Generalized expectations of random disharmony are wise.
Always looking over your shoulder is paranoia!
And always waiting for the other shoe to drop...well that's post traumatic stress syndrome!
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The sad thing is... as you get older you come to realize that you don't so much pilot your life, as you just try to hold on, in a screaming, defiant ball of white-knuckle anxious fury
