problem
 

Hi all,

first time I write on this sexuality board. I have a problem with my sex life, I know I don't know any of you, and this might seem very impersonal, but it's easier to tell personal things like this over the internet then telling this to close friends... so here goes

I met this very nice girl, we get along very well and everything is just fine, but the only problem I'm having is in bed :(

we are both not that experienced in bed, but lets say we know what to do. The problem is when I want to penetrate here, it seems very very tight and when I try to push harder she tells me to stop because it's hurting her. It's not that I have a oversized penis, just the average normal size I guess. I don't know what to do ? Will this go by when we try more ? We tried different positions, me on top ,she on top, but both were the same.. Are there better possitions to start with ?

As you can imagine, she's a bit embarresed with this. I tell here I don't care, and everything is fine, but I would love to have some better sex with here!

sorry for my bad english but it has been a while :-)

Foreplay foreplay foreplay. Get her excited and relaxed. Use your mouth, your tongue, and then start gently with your hands. Make sure that she is relaxed and accepting of fingers and comfortable. Have some lube handy. Try it with her on top so that she's in control of the rate of penetration.

It sounds like you've got a good attitude about it, so have fun, and good luck!

did enough foreplay, I can tell you this: she's wet :-) but even when I use my fingers I can only penetrate with 2, and it's still tight

Lub is the key ! ;)

Did anyone mention foreplay, and lots of it???:D

Seriously, for a change, spend the time to get her off WITHOUT penetration. That means hands, mouth, whatever. Learn what it takes to get her loose and wet. Or, if she masturbates, have her do that for you. She may not be comfotable with that, but its worth a shot. Nobody knows how to turn her on like she does:)

You might want to read the following:

http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/e...cle/001487.htm

I had a girlfriend who had the same problem. It's amazing how strong those muscles can be.

it's going to take time of course. I like the advice tooth gave. You need to get her off without any penile penetration first. If you've done this great! You could also try getting her close to the point of climax then backing off and teasing. Then get her close to climax again and reapeat. Sounds rather cruel but it can be fun and you'll be pleased by the animal instincts that appear out of her :D Also try using your fingers and right as you pull your fingers out..penetrate her with your penis. For the pain..I would go with the standard missionary position or let her get on top of you that way she can control the depth and pace. It will make it easier on her and eventually you! Good luck and keep us posted :thumbsup:

I have the same problem with my BF sometimes..try giving her an all over body massage..most of the time its just tension and stress...and of course teh foreplay tips still apply..wish you luck

It sounds like she is too tense...You need to relax her. The Vagina is made to stretch, but it is also a muscle, so if she is nervous or tense for whatever reason, she won;t be able to unclench

i agree wholeheartedly. you might not be able to get her to open up (pun half-intended) until you can really interact with her. initially, i say talk more and only make it about sex when you're both ready. if you've already gotten there, try to make her go crazy by using something other than penetration. touch her, use your tongue, if you're feeling brave then tease her (the reason i say this is some girls can get mighty pissed when you just stop) or don't touch her at all: breathe on her, in her ear, "downstairs," all the good stuff. any combination of the above is good too (i like to lick my girlfriend and blow on the saliva while its still wet, makes for a "cool" sensation) but moreover, make sure she's ready in every sense of the word: emotionally, physically, otherwise...

have fun and don't just have sex, make love.

Not just lube, but patience. You're both inexperienced, that's okay. Now she's at the point where she wants to do more than pee from that area. It can take a bit of time, but she'll work up to it. Especially if you treat her right.
You're young - you have lots of time to explore every part of her. Work on that - w/your hands and tongue, and any other part the two of you choose.
Learn to enjoy each other!