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-   -   Give me feedback about safe sex! (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-sexuality/46149-give-me-feedback-about-safe-sex.html)

motdakasha 02-18-2004 07:14 PM

Give me feedback about safe sex!
 
Okay, so for my midterm (a.k.a. Condom Art Project), I want feedback from you guys:

1) Please state age, gender, sexual orientation, and whether you are or are not currently in a relationship. For the following questions, if you are not in a relationship, please answer them as if you were in a relationship.

2) Do you practice safe sex (that is, using protective gear like condoms and dental dams)? What methods do you prefer to use?

3) How do you acquire your protective gear? What are your feelings when you are buying/acquiring your gear (pride, confidence, embarrassed, etc.)? Why do you think you have these feelings?

4) a. Why do you practice safe sex? How do you feel after you've had safe sex?
-or-
b. Why don't you practice safe sex? How do you feel after you've had unprotected sex?

5) Do you use birth control? Does this affect your decision to practice safe sex or not?

sexymama 02-18-2004 07:21 PM

1. 42, female, hetro, engaged
2. no -- both tested prior to engaging in sexual activity
3. when have had to buy condoms, no big deal
4. we are monogomous so I feel just fine about it
5. I'm on the patch -- and yes, we used condoms when I wasn't on it

insidious_machinae 02-18-2004 07:51 PM

This message has been deleted.

WarWagon 02-18-2004 08:01 PM

1. 18, male, straight, not in relationship
2. Practice safe sex w/condoms
3. Buy them wherever is convenient, usually the drug store or grocery store. I look at it as no big deal, won't be the first person to buy them, nor will I be the last.
4. To avoid pregnancy/transmission of disease. After sex I feel as though its just another part of the day.
5. Ex didnt use birth control, but if she had, I'd probably be less likely to use a condom in a monogomous relationship with a girl who has been tested.

Wingless 02-18-2004 08:08 PM

1. 18, male, straight, in 1 year relationship
2. Safe sex w/ condoms
3. I buy them from Meijer, which is the kind of store that literally has everything (grocery, clothing, tools, medicine). They have those self-scan checkouts, "U-Scan", and I use that. Even then on the reciept a pack of condoms is read as "Medical Device". Honestly I feel a bit embarrassed, I can't grab a pack of condoms unless no one else is in the aisle. Maybe I'm a bit embarrassed that I'm having sex.
4. Still in High School, and my girlfriend in her first year of college, we're avoiding pregnancy. Immediately afterwords I feel fine, but after awhile I feel worried until she's on her period. Yeah, her period is a relief to me.
5. Besides condoms, at the moment no birth control, only because neither of us has access to it.

Rlyss 02-18-2004 08:10 PM

1) 20 year old heterosexual male. Been in a relationship for about 11 months.

2) We only use the birth control Pill. We used condoms until we got tested and she went on the Pill.

3) Honestly I do feel a little embarassed because I only ever buy/have bought condoms as a single purchase. That's a bit silly though, so no real feelings when I buy them.

4) I am constantly mildly worried about pregnancy and try to use condoms, but I get absolutely no feeling when I wear a condom so we use the Pill. We've had no problems with me pulling out as well as her being on the Pill for almost a year now. I'm not worried about STDs (I've been tested twice, she's been tested once and I am her first partner) but pregnancy does worry me.

5) The next time she and I have sex I'm using a condom despite getting hardly any feeling. This is because I don't trust the Pill 100%, nor do I trust a condom 100% to avoid pregnancy. I think my best bet is to use both.

RenaissanceII 02-18-2004 08:59 PM

1)40, male, bi, single
2) safe sex, condoms
3)work for a major drug retailer, have had few problems w/ buying them (pride/confidence), was treated as well as I treat anyone i ring up who buys them
4)i feel ok, except that sensation during the act tends to be cut down
5) other forms of birth control may (or may not) be employed

noodles 02-18-2004 09:05 PM

1) 20, male, hetero, in a new relationship

2) condom

3) embaressment a little, but that stems more from the fact that i'm quite a shy, low key person and when someone has a box of condoms in their hand, people at least think twice and size you up.

4) i do it by default. i'd rather not have a kid now, i'm too young. also, though i'm fairly sure i'm clean (never been tested, but virgin up until this new relationship), i've never seen any of her test results (you can say it and mean it and think it and it not be true) and i'd like to stay presumably clean.

5) <strike>i don't</strike> she doesn't, though i think its not a bad idea for the ladies as a replacement or supplement. its personal preference, really.

vevaphon 02-18-2004 09:40 PM

1. 29, Male, Hetero, in an "open" relationship

2. We do not use condoms with each other, she has an IUD. We do use condoms with others. We both get regular blood tests.

3. i generally get mine at places that stock what i like. I am alergic to nonoxynyl-9, so that can be a bit limiting. Usually Online sex shops have what i want. i am not embarrassed by buying condoms, these days. really, it's not unlike buying underwear.

4. I feel fine with it. i dislike the feel of condoms, though.

5. see above, i think that anwers this line. I use it by default, just to be sure. nothing, after all is 100% protection against pregnancy or disease.

ariekitten 02-18-2004 10:30 PM

1) 20, female, heterosexual (bi-curious?), not in a steady relationship.

2) Yes i practice safe sex. I like birth control, VCF, and ribbed trojans.

3) I go to walmart and buy it. My feelings when buying it are indifferent. They're products i need, just like food and clothing. So it's not a big deal.

4) a. I practice safe sex because i don't want to get pregnant or contract a disease. also i don't want the other person to be at risk, either. afterward I feel like i've had a good experience, but that i've been smart about it.

5) Yes i am on the birth control pill. actually ever since i've been on the pill i've been more inclined to have sex without a condom (but only with someone i know is clean).

Johnny Rotten 02-18-2004 10:31 PM

1. 25, male, hetero, single

2. Condoms as a rule, then both of us get tested if things get serious, at which point she'll be using the pill or some other medically approved form of sustained release contraception.

3. Buy condoms at the drug store or supermarket or convenience store--No preference. Many clinics give them away. I like to buy them with her, so we can choose and peruse. I've always gotten a kick out of that, and it can eliminate self-consciousness.

4. I practice safe sex because I don't care for the potentially deadly risks involved, nor am I interested in unplanned pregnancy.

5. I'm not more or less likely to have sex with her because she's using contraception or has access to condoms and whatnot. I'm more likely to practice safe sex with her.

Vaultboy 02-18-2004 11:07 PM

1. 22, M, Straight, new relationship

2. Yes. condom.

3. Buy condoms. Normally at the supermarket: its cheaper than in a pharmacy. I also have backups that I get from the health clinic.

4) a. In order to avoid pregnancy, and initially, STD's. We both got tested since, but barrier contraceptives are still a good idea in general. Afterwards, I'm still slightly concerned, since condoms aren't 100% safe.

5. I want her to use birth control as well. I'm less eager to have sex when she's in her fertile window, which is a bit complicated, since that's when she's more needy.


im2smrt4u 02-18-2004 11:17 PM

1. 19, M, straight, been with my g/f for one year.

2. Yes. Condoms.

3. I by them at Wal-Mart. Cheapest place in town. I'm proud of what I'm buying, because I'm getting laid.

4. Because there is no way I'm having a kid now! With condoms (combined with pulling out) I'm not worried one bit.

5. She isn't on birth control yet.

Loup 02-19-2004 04:04 AM

1) 26, Male, straight, in a relationship

2) I use condoms occasionally ~ we have both been tested.

3) I buy the condoms from the local drug store. No special feelings as it is just supplies that I am buying.

4) (a) We are practice safe sex because we both know that we are not ready for a child with our current situation - we both have gone back to school to further our education. After sex I feel great, thanks for asking :) Overall I don't worry at all and have confidence in the birth control.

5) She's on the Depo shot and I have the utmost confidence in it. Hence the occasionally for the condoms.

CinnamonGirl 02-19-2004 05:15 AM

1. 22, female, hetero, together for 5 years, married for about 3.
2. We don't use anything except birth control--although I consider that, along with long-time monogamy, "safe."
3.
Quote:

embaressment a little, but that stems more from the fact that i'm quite a shy, low key person
Yep, me too. I don't buy condoms very often, though, usually someplace like Wal-Mart or Target when I do buy them.
4. He doesn't want kids yet--I do, but I can wait, since there's a few things I'd like to do first. And I always feel great after sex :D
5. Yep, I'm on Depo, which I'm also confident about--if I were on the pill, we'd definitely use condoms, but I'm not, so we don't.

Charlatan 02-19-2004 05:36 AM

1) Please state age, gender, sexual orientation, and whether you are or are not currently in a relationship. For the following questions, if you are not in a relationship, please answer them as if you were in a relationship.

35, M, Straight, Married


2) Do you practice safe sex (that is, using protective gear like condoms and dental dams)? What methods do you prefer to use?

Not always. We've been together for 16 years and the only birth control we use is Condoms or withdraw (20/80).

3) How do you acquire your protective gear? What are your feelings when you are buying/acquiring your gear (pride, confidence, embarrassed, etc.)? Why do you think you have these feelings?

Buy them at the drugstore. Was embarrased when I was a teenager but got over it. No big deal to it. I think it has to do with the fact that I relized everyone has sex and buying condoms makes me look responsible (STDs, pregnancy, etc.) rather than just some horny guy.


4) a. Why do you practice safe sex? How do you feel after you've had safe sex?
-or-
b. Why don't you practice safe sex? How do you feel after you've had unprotected sex?

To prevent pregancy. STD isn't an issue with my wife and I.

In the past when I didn't practice safe sex I always felt a little weirded out... (this was before I met my wife)

5) Do you use birth control? Does this affect your decision to practice safe sex or not?

Yes. No.

sigma1042 02-19-2004 11:03 AM

1) Please state age, gender, sexual orientation, and whether you are or are not currently in a relationship.

23, male, straight, yes, long term- long distance exclusive relationship

2) Do you practice safe sex

only condoms and spermicidal lubes for vaginal intercourse
but don't always use depending on situation

3) How do you acquire your protective gear? What are your

my gf or myself at drug or grocery store, sometimes have feeling of pride or guilt, usually depending on clerk, but feel self conscious enough not to buy at stores i frequent,

4) a. Why do you practice safe sex?

to prevent pregnancy, no chance of stds, both clean when started, one was virgin and the other had only one partner, that was clean

5) Do you use birth control?
used bc pills in past

ratbastid 02-19-2004 12:19 PM

1) 29 year old Straight Male, Married 8 years. Also in a brand new relationship with another woman/couple.

2) We do not practice safe (ie barrier-method) sex either with ourselves or with our new friends.

3) Back when we did, we bought them at the grocery store much discomfort. And giggling. We were 17 and 18 at the time.

4) My wife and I compared backgrounds before we started having sex, 12 years ago, and agreed that we were safe to do without. As a matter of fact, that was a moderately risky decision. But it turns out to have been the right one. We've used condoms only when needed as a backup method of birth control (missed pills, etc).

Our new friends are extremely safety-conscious and have been regularly tested for many many things. I'm regularly tested for AIDS and Hep-B when I donate blood, my wife has been tested for AIDS, and prior to this new relationship she and I had been monogamous and asymptomatic for 12 years. Given all that, we all feel quite safe having unprotected sex.

Having settled our concerns about it beforehand, we have no regrets afterward.

5) My wife and our friend are both on the pill. We would never dream of having sex without some form of birth control, but it's not about disease prevention for us.

tec-9-7 02-19-2004 01:35 PM

Re: Give me feedback about safe sex!
 
1 - 36 - Male - Hetero - In Relationship

2 - Yes - Condoms - about to be phased out - see 5 below

3 - No feelings in particular - I buy them when I need them.

4 - Because I'm not interested in fatherhood - I feel comfortable that my g/f isn't going to get pregnant

5 - Yes - previously condoms, but I've recently had a vasectomy - when I'm pronounced sperm-free - condoms go bye-bye. I am confident that my g/f and I are exclusive so I see no need for further protection once the risk of pregnancy is removed.

JStrider 02-19-2004 02:15 PM

1) Male 20 hetero not in a commited relationship
2) yah i always practice safe sex to a degree... if its a newer partner ill use a condom and possibly a contraceptive foam or whatnot... if its a girl im more familiar with and shes on the pill then bareback...

3) when i started buyin condoms i was pretty nervous about it... and would go back to the pharmacy get em check out there and put em in a a bag and leave... now i just go to walmart and grab a "family size" box toss it in the cart and go about my shopping...

4) I practice safe sex cuz i dont want any kids... clones.. maybe... but not kids... after safe sex... i usually feel like i just got laid and dont have to worry about babies...

5) with birthcontrol and a long term monogomus partner that i know is clean i will generally not use other contraception

amge 02-19-2004 04:17 PM

1: 30, Hetero, in relationship.
2: Practice safe sex to avoid getting GF pregnant.
3: No problem buying condoms at the store.
4: We don't want kids. We are both neg. on any STDs.
5: We don't want kids.

rockzilla 02-19-2004 04:20 PM

1) Male, 25, hetero, single
2) Condoms, unless it's a committed relationship where I know she's using the pill.
3) For the longest time I got them for free when I helped run a drug/safe sex info booth at local raves. Nowadays, I buy them and am pretty indifferent about it, they're just condoms, it's no big deal.
4) I don't want kids or diseases. While I prefer condomless sex, I'll wear one unless I know she's on the pill and clean, sex with a condom is still pretty awesome.
5) If a significant other is using birth control, and is clean, I won't use a condom.

minyn 02-19-2004 04:57 PM


1)
19, F, hetero. single.
2)

Always. condoms and birth control when im on it.

3)
Buy it at a store, nothing to be ashamed of. im being smart so they must accept that and if they dont, theyre still getitng money. im me when i buy, no big deal. if i get looks, ill return them or smile.

4) a.wear condoms. listen to each other, and its more enjoyable. no need to worry about repercussions later.
-or-
b. Why don't you practice safe sex? How do you feel after you've had unprotected sex?STUPID IDEA.

5) I will when i get to the doctor again. an extra precaution is always a good thing.

02-20-2004 11:55 AM

1) 23, M, Straight, in committed relationship
2) Condoms -rarely.
3) I just toss them in the cart when i'm at the store. However, i buy them so rarely that sometimes i do get a little anxiety at the checkout.
4) I can't think of a reason why we use condoms when we actually remember to besides avoiding pregnancy. We've been together and monogamous long enough that we're not worried about disease - I don't feel any differently about sex after having safe sex except for being extra worn out from all the extra work it takes me to get off whilst wearing a condom.

5. I don't want kids or anything but really hatesusing condoms. My SO used to be on the pill but claimed that it was making her fat. *claimed* - really the problem was that she would forget to take it for days at a time. Right now our birth control method involves pulling out and aiming for the boobs. We've been told that it'd be pretty hard for her to get pregnant anyways... famous last words.

visotech 02-20-2004 12:16 PM

1) 18 Male, Heterosexual, in a relationship.

2) We use male condoms with spermicide and lubrication only for intercorse. We are both std free and exlusive, thus no need for protection during oral sex.

3) I buy condoms whenever i need them and im already at the store. I feel they're a bit too expensive, so i started buying them at the on campus health store at my college. I feel confident when buying them, i feel responsible beacuase im taking the necessary precautions to safe sex.

4) a. I practice safe sex becuase a pregnancy is something that we do not want in our lives at this point. Having safe sex feels good, and secure, i dont have the lingering thought of a pregnancy in my head

5) My gf is intrested in the pill and we will decide if its right for us. It seems the side effects of the pill are really heavy, and we are not sure if it is worth it.

Jim Kata 02-20-2004 01:06 PM

1. Virginia. 27. Male. Hetero. In monogamous relationship

2. No

3. N/A

4b. My girlfriend is on the pill and we practice monagamy.
Afterwards, I think, "A sandwich would be really nice right now." In other words...nothing really.

5. Girlfriend is on the pill. Yes it affects our decision. Our only concern was pregnancy, not STDs

doncalypso 02-20-2004 01:57 PM

1) 22 years old, heterosexual male, 2-year ongoing monogamous relationship.

2) Do not practice safer sex...we both got tested for STDs on several occasions and turned out negative for STDs and HIV.

3) Before she went on the pill we used condoms. I purchased them from the Health Center at school, and I felt no shame at buying them.

4) We are both HIV-negative and are monogamous.

5) Yes she is on the pill... hence the reason why we don't use condoms.


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